Thursday, July 24, 2008

Of Racist Comments, Sexist Comments & Generalisations

Was looking through Timothy Tiah the Lion King of Nuffnang's blog and I read his latest post entitled What I Look For In A Girl & Why I Wanna Get Married. (It's a good post. Go read.) As always, there were plenty of comments. (He is the Lion King of Nuffnang, after all.) But there was this one comment buried in the lot that really caught my eye. So much so that I decided to visit its owner's blog.



Her name's Melissa. And I'm guessing she's
his ex. His already wedded 24-year-old ex.
(Not to him, of course. Duh.)


Well, I've gone through all her posts (she seems to have just recently started blogging) and the more I read, the more I find it difficult to believe how amazing her relationship with her 'I am' husband is! (They've gotten themselves registered so that makes them lawfully wedded – hence the 'I am' and not an 'I do' since the wedding reception and dinner has yet to take place.)


And darn it, I'm envious as hell!


He cooks. He washes her clothes. He mows the lawn. He doesn't complain when she forgets to make dinner. He gives her pedicures. (That includes toenail filing AND painting!!!) He massages her toes during train rides. And he smells them, too! ARGH!!!


DAMMIT, I WANT A GUY
WHO WILL MASSAGE MY FEET
AND SMELL MY TOES, TOO!!!



Sigh.

Oh, and did I forget to mention?
He's an ang mor dude.

-_-


You know ah, I really think that we need more ang mor guys to go around lah. Chinese men are absolutely useless in this respect. In fact, they probably rank as one of the least romantic lovers in the world. If not the least. -_- You know what their problem is? Their problem is that they think that romance dies when the chase does.


Bodoh mia mereka semua.


You see ah... With the Indians, you have Shah Rukh Khan running through the fields and meadows while shaking his booty in his leading lady's direction. With the Malays, you have P. Ramlee singing his heart out from atop coconut trees. With the Westeners, you have the legendary Romeo & Juliet balcony serenade scene.


And with the Chinese?

Well, you have Wong Fei Hong and
Fong Sai Yuk kicking kung fu butt.

-_-


How lah like that??? No wonder our Chinese boys are stepping into the BGR market in the pathetic state of being so devoid of the ability to romance and express love lah! Haiyo!


So I got to thinking. Rather than painstakingly re-teach hopeless cases what they've already learnt over the years, rather than changing mindsets and worldviews, and rather than revising deeply ingrained cultural practices... why not just hunt down a good ang mor and marry him instead??? (See, I told you I was brilliant.)


It'll be so much easier, right? Plus, have you ever thought about the many, many, MANY plus points of marrying an ang mor leng chai? A lot, okayyy! Hear me out.


If you marry an ang mor...


You'll get to truly enjoy being romanced. In general, ang mors are waaay more romantic than Chinese men lah. They're more expressive. They'd go down on one knee for a proposal. And not just expect you to understand that you'd both get married some day. They'd buy you flowers for no reason at all. And they'd bring you out on official dates where you get to put on make-up and play dress up. And that's just the tip of the iceberg.


You'll get to be on the receiving end of nice words. Nice words that don't come out sounding wrong, that is. (I.e. "I thinking you is very bee-oo-tee-fool today. You thinking me also?") They're better in English. (Duh.) And they're usually good with words, sweet talking and the like. (Girls say they don't like it but in reality, they're all suckers for it.) Oh, and they've all got that to-die-for accent that always make girls go weak in the knees. And they sure as hell wouldn't end up calling me Pah-meh-lah. -_-


You wouldn't have to be the one pulling all the weight at home and in the kitchen. They'd cook. And bake. For you. Cina men want YOU to do the cooking and baking. They deem it your responsibility. They say they're putting food on the table while they work. That's not true. They put money in your hands and that's the end of it for them. YOU go to the grocers. YOU prepare the dishes. And YOU put the food on the table.


You'll be able to wear any shoe you want. 6-inch stilettos? No problem! 8-inch heels also can. Cos they're tall. They're all tall. And even if they're not that tall, they're still taller than our average Chinese boys. Sigh. Why so stunted ah, you all? Go do yourselves a favour and play more basketball can?


You won't have to wait till you're looking past your prime before you walk down the aisle. They tend to settle down earlier. (That blogger I told you about earlier? Well, she's my age. And her husband is one year younger than she is.) Don't know why that is, but I'd say it's a good thing. Why wait when you've already found The One? And if anything, you'd increase your chances of being able to see your grandkids and great-grandkids. (Mind you, I say that in all seriousness.) Which brings me to my next point.


You'll get to be proud parents of pretty kids with dark hair, fair skin and blue-green eyes. Or those with brown hair, fair skin and hazel eyes. Or those with black hair, freckled skin and deep set eyes. Aiyah, I could go on forever. A lot of options lah.


You know, I could go on forever. Really.

Listen to me and go for
the ang mor boy lah. Serious.


Stand outside Uplands, St. Christopher's or Dalat International, and wait. Sure got wan. Guarantee. And I think that it shouldn't be too difficult to snag an ang mor guy, either. I've heard that they have a thing for Asian women. =p


And just so you know, I didn't even really put a lot of thought into those points you saw, okay. They just came and I wrote them offhand. So that means that if I did put in the effort, there'd be a whole lot more comin' atcha from where those came from.


Anyhew, I'd kick in my extra neurons to add to that list right now but, unfortunately for you, even my back-up brain's all dried up already. It's been a long day and I'm pretty much running on empty. (See, I so nice. Tired also write long, long controversial post for you all to read.) Some other time, alrights? Nights!


p/s: Here's a friendly reminder to the cha bohs out there: girls, go do yourselves a favour and hunt down an ang mor boy. Tentu tak menyesal. Kalau dapat, mesti hantar kad jemputan kahwin, ya? =p

60 comments :

JYJL said...

Are u raging war with my species? Hahaha!!

Guys shud look for ang mo girl also lar.

BenYong said...

sounds like a cina boy directed OTJ to me!

Melissa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pam Song said...

ATTN: JYJL
– Haha. War it is, Mr Yuean! My armour is on! My battle gear is ready! Time to face your death...

Tene nene. Tene nene.

Go ahead. Find yourself an ang mor girl. BUT know this: Chinese men will find it tougher to be comfortable with a Chinese girl because ang mor girls will always expect this treatment. (Cos they grew up in that society.) And you Chinese men will have to work extra hard to just be at par with your Western counterparts. Hah!

...except if you come from CHC and have Ps Kev's training lah. *grin*


ATTN: BenYong
– HAHAHA. Time to buck up, Benji!


ATTN: Melissa
– Eh! You read my blog wan ah? Haha. But... who cares? Cos, YAY! I have a wedding to look forward to! Haha.

And yes, your ang mor's definitely a one of a kind. One. Of. A Kind. *grumble grumble grumble*

=p

Congratulations on finding him. You're a lucky one. But I'm sure he's a lucky guy, too! =)

Women deserve no less than men who will love them all their lives, and who will love them in more ways than just by 'putting food on the table'.

XOXO,
pamsong

zecount said...

some how this post is not very encouraging -_-'''

Anonymous said...

ermmm... ang moh men are also known not to take showers for extended periods of time, be abusive and controlling and have philandering tendencies...

Hollywood's got you babe :D

But in all fairness, I think both angmohs and non-angmohs men can improve much much more...

Pam Song said...

ATTN: zecount
– Haha. Time to buck up and kick in the extra effort. And didn't you read my comment reply to JYJL??


ATTN: lomantik
– Well, true. But I'm writing this karangan and I'm choosing to write the stuff that promote what I'm saying so... itulah kesimpulannya. Budak putih bagus. Budak kuning mesti belajar. =p

Ahhh, I love that Hollywood grip. =p

But nah. I have a number of friends who're dating ang mor guys and... sigh *heart melts* they all so romantic wan wor!!! And even those who are ABC or a little more exposed, they're more romantic than Malaysian Chinese boys. -_-

sheon said...

*coughs*...........right.

Anonymous said...

Huh?! Chinese men can also romance la....just that you havent found one yet kua...

Can also give nice words in both English mix Hokkien la....

Chinese man can cook also la (never see a chinese man cook ah?!).......

Oh regarding the height thingy, no comment! We could be tiny but enough to sastify our sweatheart also lor.....

Anyhew, chinese girls arent that big also....Maybe we should look for ang mor girls also COS:-

1. They are super mature in size ( All men sure like to see wan)
2. They are more DIRECT compare to Chinese girls......We like that cos we dont have to 2nd guess the intentions....
3. They cook nice pastas...SLURP!
4. Their eyes are so SO SO alluring. Beh tahan betul la....
5. They are more passionate in relationship too...
6. Their maturity in conduct and emotions are so attracting.....

Come! Come! Any 'ang mor' wanna be my gf?! Wahahahaha! =P

yapthomas said...

You just can't stereotype all of them!!

zecount said...

and all the XYs just commented ...somehow this post was meant to shake the boat one .. me thinks anyway .. bad tinki !

AA said...

As an ethnic Chinese male, it is my duty and my obligation to comment on this post.

And i'd like to say that i SO agree with Pam.


"Chinese men are absolutely useless in this respect. In fact, they probably rank as one of the least romantic lovers in the world. If not the least. -_- You know what their problem is? Their problem is that they think that romance dies when the chase does."

This is so true. Do you all know what Malaysian Chinese Men turn their attention to after a successful courtship? They actually concentrate on their careers and making money! This is just so freaking disgusting! Since when did supporting a family and bread-winning become as important as romancing? And they dare use the excuse that unlike their ang moh counterparts, they do not have government subsidies, unemployment benefits, social safety nets and such. When will Malaysian Chinese Men learn that in modern times, love alone will sustain us? Food and lodging and clothing? To hell with that la...


"And with the Chinese? Well, you have Wong Fei Hong and Fong Sai Yuk kicking kung fu butt."

This is so true... Chinese culture is all about violence... There has been talk about stories like 'The Weaver Girl and The Cowherd' and 'Madam White Snake' blah blah blah... But who wants to go so deep into literature? We just want to be shallow and watch blockbuster films...


"So I got to thinking. Rather than painstakingly re-teach hopeless cases what they've already learnt over the years, rather than changing mindsets and worldviews, and rather than revising deeply ingrained cultural practices... why not just hunt down a good ang mor and marry him instead??? (See, I told you I was brilliant.)"

Yalor... How to erase 5000 years of culture? You know, there's this new tribe of raiders... Called Vikings or something... Very SEXY wan... and very tall... oooohhhh....


"You'll get to be on the receiving end of nice words."

Yeah. I have this ang moh fren... His name is Terminator. Very sweeeeet wan... Everyday before he goes to office he will tell his girlfriend 'I'll be back'. When he comes back and the girl starts to talk, he will show her his palm and say 'talk to the hand'.


"They're better in English."

All these Cina-Beng... All can't speak proper Engrish wan... Dunno why they all no want to betray their own heritage and whole-heartedly embrace a foreign culture...


"You wouldn't have to be the one pulling all the weight at home and in the kitchen."

Yeah. I got this other ang moh fren... His name is Homer Simpson...


"You won't have to wait till you're looking past your prime before you walk down the aisle."

So that when you are past your prime you can walk down it again... The more times the better!


"Here's a friendly reminder to the cha bohs out there: girls, go do yourselves a favour and hunt down an ang mor boy"

This is a super idea! It will act as a great filter. After all the frivolous, romance-chasing chicks get shipped to Ireland and Scotland and Finland, we'd be left with the solid, demure and mature ones. It's doing us a favour too!

Thank you PamSong!
Man sui man sui man man sui!

YYAAAAYYYYY!!!!!

yapthomas said...

WTF Andrew!

You just killed the prospect of guys hitting on girls to below sub-zero.

and all the ang mohs will come and chinese men will be deprived of ladies. hahaha

good job..
not my worries tho! :P

Jeffro said...

OMG!.. U talk bad about ur species of the opposite sex.. GRR!

What is this?

Sigh.. Gals with the ang mor preference..

no offense to Ang mor lang's..but they may do anything for you, yet they may take everything from you... They're so open minded.. that if they decide to switch partners, they'd say "c'mon, it's better this way"..

not all chinese guys are like what you have described.. rite Kak Pam? Hahaha..

btw what is BGR? I know RGB stands for red, green, blue... but what is BGR? black, grey, resene?

AA said...

hi yapthomas,

er, not very sure wat you mean leh...

Jeffro said...

ATTN: Chris

I kinda disagree with ya on the first part.. (or at least, its bcoz im different from the rest)

firstly, i believe romantic dies when one ends his/her life.. this does not change at all.. (for me of course)

weih.. i think career comes first.. therefore, earning a good paying job first, before getting married! Hahaha.. once career established, family comes first..

I dun believe in violence though.. Intelligence is what matters in the real world..


BUT... I DO AGREE WITH YOU ON THE OTHER POINTS!! WOOTZA!

AA said...

jeffro,

BGR stands for Bitchy Generalist Racist. Of course it could also mean Boy Girl Relationship...

and why you ATTN your comment to Chris? Did Chris comment? Why I can't find his comment?

ming said...

With ang mor guy, you will die faster!
you either get lucky to find a good one or a reaaaaaaaly bad one.
And they are pretty cold blooded in general, especially they want to end a relationship.
they can be really romantic n shower u with the sugar coated words but the next second can send u to hell too!!

My vote to Asian guy for a stable future!!!

LOL

AA said...

My Vote to Ming as a solid, demure, mature, Asian Girl! Yay!

JYJL said...

seriously... is surprising to see comments come mostly from guys or the girls is too busy hunting now?

wah.. ming is so daring to challenge Pah-Meh-lah ya~ hahaha~

Anonymous said...

Haha..Ming! You officially became my IDOL! =)))

Jeffro said...

LOL! *my bad* Sorry Andrew..
was to u i guess.. *heh* I ter-silap nama.. Hahaha..

ooo.. *updating library of abbrev*
thx!

Alrite Ming! Wootza! U Rawks!

infinitium said...

i refuse to be cajoled into making war with you on the matter....

... then again, being the romantic fool i am... screw it! You touched a sensitive topic! rawrrrr!

You're absolutely wrong in this matter. Chinese guys can be bloody romantic K (nope, not gonna list the countless many ways we can be).

It all depends on the person involved and how much he's willing to go the distance.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

Don't let some rotten apples spoil the lot!

Melissa said...

I started reading your blog after you left a message on mine ma. =P

I feel it is my obligation to inform you guys the truth. I quickly read trough your comments and true enough there were some still believe in the misconception about ang mors don't take showers, abusive, controlling etc.

I'll try to explain as simple as I can. The misconception that we, asian (including myself b4) used to think about ang mor are basically 100% generalisation of the minority of the ang mors.

We should open our eyes bigger and stop believing in rumours. Despite the skin colour, they are exactly like us except for the facts Pamsong pointed out. So, if you ask me, I would advice to all the asian guys out there, instead of being negative, learn a thing or two from this entry.

And, don't be to quick to judge me. There are some points I love about Chinese boys too, and John(my husband) are following them religiously.

xoxo
Mel

luvkitties said...

Hi, I like what you said about chinese men. Some points are just hilarious, especially the kung fu fighting part. Most I do agree with.

But not ALL chinese men are that way, and definitely not all ang mors are perfect. Some qualities they should learn from each other. I think it depends on the personalities too. And whether you meet the right guy or not la.

Either way, as long as you're happy, that's all it counts. ^^

Pam Song said...

ATTN: sheon
– Haha. You know I'm right. =p Glad to know you agree. Haha.


ATTN: Adrian Lim
– No lah. Chinese men romance less. Much less.

And I tell you, nice words sound half-bad in Hokkien lah. Eeyer. At least Mandarin summore okay. Hokkien? Eeyer. Eeyer. Eeyer.

And no, I'm not saying that Chinese men can't cook. I'm saying that generally speaking, MOST Chinese men want their wives to cook and they just sit and eat.

Uh, and I never once said that you Chinese men were tiny. Haha.

And sure. Go ahead and find yourself an ang mor girl. I support. And I hope you catch her. All the best. =)


ATTN: yapthomas
– Whoops. Just did. =p


ATTN: zecount
– Haha. What's wrong with giving the boat a little nudge or two? =p It's been pretty quiet here of late, no? Haha.

Pam Song said...

ATTN: Andrew Chua
– HAHAHAHA. Your duty and your obligation? Haha. Oh-kaaay. If you say so. Haha.

And... sarcasm or no sarcasm, YOU AGREE WITH ME! YESSS!!! Man sui, Pam Song, man man sui! Woo hoo!


ATTN: yapthomas
– Who you khao-ing now? Why you worry about prospect? Haha.


ATTN: Jeffro
– It's not ang mor preference. It's ang mor positive attribute preference.

And in terms of that switching partners example, it really depends on the individual. I'm sure you wouldn't date a person who'd not respect the sanctity of the relationship anyways. So... technically speaking, you wouldn't date such an 'open' ang mor anyways.

And no, not all Chinese boys are the way I say they are. Just as not all ang mor boys are as nice as I say they are. =)

BGR is BOY-GIRL RELATIONSHIP lah! Haiyo. Why you dunno wan? At least Andrew knows. Haha.

And Andrew did raise a good point. Why you ATTN to Chris? Hmmm.

Oh, and about your response to that non-existent Chris comment, I don't believe in chasing a career before settling down. To me, while you're fighting for a good career, all the better it is if you have a partner to support you and help you on your way to success.

And as much as you men say that once career is established then family comes first, I don't believe you will make that shift in priority when the time comes. You'd have been too used to focusing your time and effort on your career. Your wife will be your job. And your woman will be your mistress. And no woman deserves that.

That aside, what do you mean when you say 'when career is established'? If it takes you 5 years. Then maybe. But what if it takes you 10 years? Or 20? Then what?

Pam Song said...

ATTN: ming
– Haha. You're biased. And as I told Jeffro, I'm looking at ang mor PLUS POINTS. Only.

And you think that Chinese guys are that nice when they break up meh? Please lah. They're not. They're all not. Stop kidding yourself.

And to be fair, any person you choose to place your heart with can send you to heaven... and then drop you to the depths of hell in the next second. Not just ang mor guys.

Chinese men give girls stabler futures? I don't see that argument. Seriously. How is that point substantiated? With what?


ATTM: Andrew Chua
– Haha. Ming is all that and more. But I disagree. =p


ATTN: JYJL
– Yeah, actually I'm surprised that so many men have chosen to speak up. Haha. But... my reader-comment base seems to be predominantly male anyways so... I guess it was to be expected. =p


ATTN: Adrian Lim
– Haha. She's taken. Stay away.


ATTN: infinitium
– Haha. Couldn't keep your mouth shut huh? =p

Anyway, who says that there are SOME rotten apples? Pfft. There are TOO MANY rotten apples in the basket okayyy!

And no, I still don't think that Chinese guys are as naturally romantic as ang mor guys. They're just more comfortable with being romantic lah. Come on. Be honest with yourself.

And sure. I agree that it depends on the person and how willing they are. But then, don't you see? It takes a Chinese man SO MUCH EFFORT to be romantic in the first place!


ATTN: Melissa
– Ahhh, I see I see. Haha. Cools. I listen to the songs on your playlist every day. =p

Thanks for clarifying (and hopefully clearing) the misconceptions these CINA BOYS have regarding the subject at hand. =p

And it's true. Ang mor or Asian, as long as he makes you happy, that's what counts. It's just that there are so many girls here who settle for less simply because they have grown accustomed to how our local boys are like. It's sad, actually. Because they deserve so much more. They just think that they're asking for too much whenever they think it.

Pam Song said...

Eh, wait. I think I meshed Melissa's response and luvkitties' response. HAHA. Sorry lah. Blur already. It's been a long day. =p

Let me try that again. Haha.


ATTN: Melissa
– Ahhh, I see I see. Haha. Cools. I listen to the songs on your playlist every day. =p

Thanks for clarifying (and hopefully clearing) the misconceptions these CINA BOYS have regarding the subject at hand. =p

And the thing is, to me, it's not so much the skin colour and hair colour and accent. (Though it'd be a nice addition to the package.) It's the cultural practices that matter. Of standing up when women leave the room. Of opening doors. Of buying flowers and all that mush. It's all that that Chinese men lack.

And it's great that John's picking up on the good Chinese men practices. That's what's great about a mixed marriage. You grow and become BETTER. You don't close one eye and blindly follow just one race.

XOXO,
pamsong


ATTN: luvkitties
– Haha. Ya lor. Famous Chinese shows are mostly kung fu movies. Haha. No ber-romance romance. =p

And yes. No man is perfect. We all just do what we can to find the one who's MOST perfect for us.

And it's true. Ang mor or Asian, as long as he makes you happy, that's what counts. It's just that there are so many girls here who settle for less simply because they have grown accustomed to how our local boys are like. It's sad, actually. Because they deserve so much more. They just think that they're asking for too much whenever they think it.

-zonked` said...

im marrying whichever kind that has the lowest sex drive. HAHA

Pam Song said...

ATTN: -zonked`
– HAHAHAHA. That is one very weird criteria!

If I'm not mistaken, Durex says it's the Japs. Maybe you should hunt down a Jap. =p

ming said...

JYJL because of you all these Asian guys la and I kena fired by her. I don't want to go back to Malaysia liao la.

Sigh. What to do. I am in love with an Asian guy.

Anonymous said...

Haha....but hor.. Im borned & bred as Asian and its my duty to serve my Asian lady! *speak in military style* =P

Whos says nice words sound half-bad in Hokkien?! Cannot be la....eg,
'Ai lu kah jeep sim' -> Love you deep deep.

Where got half bad?! It sounds bad if you dunno how to use only la...

And she is my IDOL la....didnt say I wanna take her also. Ladies like Ming will attract a lot of guys la....=)

JYJL said...

is okay ming, you'll be warmly welcome by all the charming asian guys. Forget about pam with her ang mo gang lar.

ming said...

LOL!!

But I have angmor friends also. friend friend can already la. =p

And hor.

chinese guy who can speak good chinese hor can also serenade his gf with sweet sweet chinese words one.

JYJL u this asian guy i have to meet u up!! i wont be in KL for too long though. =( probably 1 or 2 days only!!

Pam Song said...

ATTN: ming
– Haha. You say only. You wanna come back wan. =p

And yes. Mandarin sweet talk is a lot better than Hokkien or Cantonese sweet talk. That wan I'll give it to you.

When you coming into KL?


ATTN: Adrian Lim
– HAHAHA. Still sounds salah lah.

And yes. Her sweet spirit is very enticing to men. Especially Asian men. And she cooks, too! Very well, in fact.


ATTN: JYJL
– Oh now we're talking sides lah?? Hmmph. Too much.

sheon said...

butyeah....you're looking at the positive side of an angmor.

what we asian guys lack in romance, we compensate it in a different department. mentality is different, culture is different.

kungfu heros?...this is hollywood punya pasal lar. only kungfu movies appeal to the masses, especially the angmors. however, of you research on chinese literature and history a little broader, there are also alot of romances and legendary love tales.

angmors have their weaknesses as well. of coz. all humans do. so, no race is greater then the other...

asian gals also have their shortcomings, hahahahaha

Pam Song said...

ATTN: Sheon
– Oh definitely. We have plenty of shortcomings. I'm not saying we're prefect. That's why I told some other comment-leaver (can't remember who and too lazy to scroll) to find an ang mor girl! Haha.

Thing is... what this post is supposed to to is SHOW you Asian men that there are a lot of things we wish you boys had or did. And it'd help if you'd put in the extra effort to help make things better, too.

So instead of being defensive, see what you guys don't have, work on it, and then maybe you'd be able to really make your woman the happiest woman on earth.

Mrs Chong said...

and and and....Ang Mo guys open the door and let the girls go in first, EVEN IF YOU DONT KNOW HIM!!!

Chinese guys? Wait for you to open the door and close it on your face if he doesn't know you. AND SNATCH FREE MILO WITH YOU!!! Lame la the guys in my uni.

Anonymous said...

lol, i dont sing atop coconut trees, cannot find one in kl, even if i do,later kena tangkap! XD

pinksterz said...

damn you brainwash me!!!

*goes out for my ang mor hunt* XD

pinksterz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
pinksterz said...

and LOL at flux's comment.

*imagine flux in sarong on a coconut tree*

uhh maybe not a very good one since well you know...sarong..and being high up on tree... XD

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha....Free advertising for Ming! She must be smilling wide now...An extra point for women like that!

And yes! Woman that can cook, ROCKS!Cos she brings in the family together with her skills! And hubby no need to worry about the children not getting proper meals....Not so much on hubby cannot eat la. =)

Sasha Leong said...

AGREED!

Though, ang mors do not fall from the sky you know =P

Unknown said...

Holy Smokes!!!,

I was only away for a day and then this bombshell!!!

All the guys in here, I got a request and it needs help from you!!

Any day if u did something nice to a lady, such as praising her on how well she looked, simple chivalrous act like open the office door whether or not she needed that helping hand. Or you had cooked a simple meal, be it Instant Maggi Mee for your loved ones. Please and i say Please!, post in on Tinki Talks, it doesnt have to be on this post. ANy subsequent post here on after, if u did something nice, romantic or chivalrous or generous, juz post it on this blog (even as a side comment, it doesnt matter).

Heck, it doesnt have to be for a lady, it can be for an elder or kid or dog or cat. Juz something nice that u did on the day, remember to express it here. If the ladies tell u off with a "perv" or "gatal!!", say so too.

Not sure if any of u had seen this Hong Kong film (Not Hollywoody) starring the two Tony Leungs. Especially Chiu Wai, who's always starring in those romantic films, that u wish u're living in one, innit?
Here's a snippet of it, its called "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Father", Also starring his juz wedded wife Carina Lau. Isn't it such a lovely song?!?! The song was sang in english and cantonese.

There's another snippet here.

Oh, I juz wanna mention, inspite of the unromanticism exhibited by the guys, but the women stuck around, and accepted it. Hat's off to them for not relli throwing massive tantrum or making a huge fuss, small fuss maybe. The culture's not geared up that way, it might be a different case for foreign-born or foreign-cultured guys.

Scroll to the top of Tinki Talks, that banner we see, lovely innit again. It inspires us, the story about the silver jubilee, it inspires. The picture perfect setting, we all aim to take those kinds of photo, whether there's any or many romantic songs, or none at all, whether there's lovely serenades a night or none at all, or whether there's intimate candlelight dinners or family oriented meals, or none at all along the way, we want to have that kind of picture taken.

We all want that end point but the journey is always different. U may replace those faces by fotoshop with a hot ang moh face or asian face. It doesnt matter. As long as u r happy and find that one u love/like/enjoy the company of. It's fine.

Btw, anyone watched "Cinema Paradiso" before? Just google it and read about its story and go to youtube for some clips of it.

Jeffro said...

Haha.. Nvr use the term BGR ma.. ^^

ermm.. Aiyo! Silap there la.. *smacks my forehead*

Well it has always been the same for me.. i can never have 2 things at one go.. if i have both, something will go wrong.. i guess God forbids me from doing so..

i duwan anything to go wrong either with relationship or career.. Can only choose 1 at a time, when one is settled, then only the other comes..

and yesh, if it takes that long.. have no choice to let it be that way.. ^_^

Simon Seow said...

Come on la. Not all ang mor that nice la and not all Chinese men liddat.

John Ang said...

JYJL, This is war... and we definitely need a battle strategy. XD
Adrian Lim definitely did his homework
Zecount, I'm with you

Pamsong, saying that 'Budak putih bagus. Budak kuning mesti belajar', which could only means You have not met me. xD

Andrew Chua, are you man's traitor? (just kidding) xD on second thought, I also support You xD

Ya lar, like jeffro said, be realistic. We just are who we are. Don't try to become what we are not. Once they act to be romantic, they will change once u got married and that's the end of your romance

nice going Ming...

And pamsong, about the Japanese, I believe they can be on the top ten list xD

Golden Bird King said...

WAH...SUPER GREAT BLOG POST!!

*looks for ang mor*
I WANT ANGMOHHHHHHHHHSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

COME TO MEHHHH!!!!!!!!!
muahahaha XD

Roshann Mathiahlagan said...

and i suppose it explains the divorce rate in most western countries.
some studies say that 1 of 2 marriages end in divorce there. :)

julian said...

Well, I feel I have to say something, being an ang-mor husband myself...

Although I'd say I have done most of what you mention, not all the time though, I bet my wife wishes I was just as you describe ;) And there are many ang-mors who think they are god's gift to Asian women, but have little respect for them or their culture.

There is one thing I would say to many men here in Malaysia, which is about cooking.

Many Malaysian men are used to their mother having cooked for them all the time, always having food ready for them when they come home; the thing is, most of the time their mother didn't have to work! If your wife/gf is working - just as you are - don't you think that she'd also like to come home to a cooked meal, just like you do? I hear about it quite often, through my wife mostly, and some women really find it unfair.

Anyway, just to say the obvious, in the end of the day it's about the individuals. Give love and respect, and you will get it too :)

yapthomas said...

"ATTN: yapthomas
– Who you khao-ing now? Why you worry about prospect? Haha."

No one in particular ATM. So, doesn't do me any harm that is.. :)

Anonymous said...

Julian: Not really lor.I think Malaysian men have accepted the fact that more women are working in the society. Hence getting the wife to cook for the family is certainly not as convenience as before.

Having said that, children at home still need to be fed. I think it will be great, if the wife can cook on selective days and the hubby to clean up the kitchen and do all the dishwashing whenever she cooks. And getting things DONE at the cost of spending time together; isn’t that a great approach?! =)

My father did that when I was a kid and he is a CHINESE. =)

MICHELLE. said...

I wanna look for ang mohs too! :D And I agree with you, you really will get to be proud parents of good-looking children. Was that what you said? Haha, in any way, interesting blog you've got! :D

AA said...

john ang,
"Andrew Chua, are you man's traitor?"

no, i am not. my comment was meant to be sarcastic.

to be honest, i am really disappointed with PamSong for this particular blog post; not because she has a different opinion, but because of the way she has chosen to air her opinion.

Pam,
just like there are different types of cars... Ferraris, VWs, Proton, and Honda... there are different types of men... Chinese, Ang Moh, Malay, Indian.

And just like your personal preference for cars, nobody will try to interfere with your personal choice of men.

But do you have to criticize the Honda and the Proton just because you prefer VWs? Especially when you are a Proton yourself?

I truly feel betrayed. Especially since so many Malaysian Chinese Males have gone out of their way to support Tinki Talks.

Pam,
you are kicking the butts of those who feed you.

Please don't see this as a petty man's comment coming from a petty man who couldn't take criticism.

If it were a personal attack, there would be no problem. But this touches on racial pride. Racist comments are always hurtful.

You obviously have a 'kick butt' style. We respect you for it. But please don't kick your own culture.

If you really want to marry an ang moh, by all means go ahead. We'd be happy for you if he were a good man.

But in promoting the plus points of B, there's really no sense in dissing A.

A Proton may be less sexy than a Ferrari, and less reliable than a Honda. But how many times have we relied on a Proton to get us to where we want to go? Where were the Ferraris and Hondas then?

Pam,
you are becoming more and more prominent as a blogger. I urge you to take responsibility for your prominence. You might want to stand WITH those who have stood by you, and not against...

A short look into history will show that there are not many groups of men more responsible and sacrificing than the group of Chinese 'koo-li' immigrants who arrived in Malaya a hundred years ago.

Your words are hurtful, even more so to the older generation who gave and gave and gave to their wives and sons and daughters, to the many uncles who scraped every last cent to put their offspring through university. Would you consider them as less than real men?

It is by their effort that some of us were fortunate enough to receive an English education. But some were not so fortunate and as result, speak broken English. Please do not look down on those who inadvertently call you Pah-Meh-Lah. Circumstances did not permit them a Westernized education. But they share our heritage. They are brothers. But instead of trying to help with their inadequacies, you are making them feel bad for something that is not really their fault.

Please spare a thought for them, and reserve your kick butt language for those who deserve to be kicked.

Best regards,
Andrew.

Jono said...

Andrew Pwn.

Ill await the day Pam marries an asian dude and chuckle.

AA said...

jo-no,

asian dude or caucasian dude - whoever it is, i'd feel sorry for the guy...

she's going to make him smell her feet... EVERY night...

Stereomanic said...

haha...i agree with andrew...
check out my blog..sorry, self advertising is cool now...
stereomanic.blogspot.com

Pam Song said...

Whoa. I should really start replying the comments on this page. Haha. (Whoopsie.)

And you king of self-plug heh? Haha.

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