A Hug And A Kiss!

Although I was blessed with two boys, my mother–son routines and expressions of love with each of them are different.

Back when I was the only one doing morning runs, I would drop Ethan off at class, kneel down on one knee and spread my arms wide open, and he would run into my arms for one last big hug and a quick peck on the lips. (It started when he was 2y3m.) We would both chant in unison, “A huggg… and a kiss!” (The “hug” was long-drawn, but the “kiss” was staccato. Haha.) Every. Single. Schooling. Morning.

Sadly, Cancer and Covid stole this routine from me. 😞

They say as mothers, we remember all the firsts but never the lasts. But I remember this last. It was 3 September 2019 – the day I started chemo. That was the last time Ethan and I said goodbye our special way. ❤️‍🩹

Chemo lasted until 17 December 2019, but immunotherapy continued until 25 August 2020. By then, we were in the thick of MCO and the boys were at home doing Zoom school. No goodbyes necessary. And even after they went back to school, they had masks on. So, no kisses either.

Before we knew it, two years had passed. 

And somewhere in that time, Ethan grew up. 🥲

Hugs were still okay, still enjoyed… but pecks on the lips, no matter how quick, felt like too much. He also used to hold onto my cheeks and smoosh his face into mine, but after Covid, something shifted. Smooshing felt germy. And my baby wasn’t a baby anymore. Somehow, daytime smooshing was no longer a thing, and nighttime cuddles were rushed cos of school the next day.

But I'm not blogging sadness today; it's joy.

Because today, we had an interaction

 that took me by surprise. 

Ethan was playing Rivals online with his buddy from school when he asked me to make him Milo. I did, and after placing his mug next to him, I leaned forward to look at his screen. To my surprise, he gave me a peck on the cheek, flashed me the biggest smile, and then turned back to his screen to continue gaming. 

That small display of affection may have meant nothing to him. But it meant the world to me and my mommy heart skipped a thousand beats. I can't even remember the last time he did that!

I was instantly brought back to a beautiful past 

my mind had forgotten even existed,
but my heart hadn’t. 🩵

Sure, it wasn’t the same hug-and-kiss we used to chant. But didn’t need to be. It was quieter. More fleeting. Almost accidental, perhaps? But in that small, carefree peck on my cheek, I felt the same love. Just older, more contained, and somehow... the same, but evolved.

Yes, it's clear, my baby has grown. But I'll continue to appreciate and accept every expression of love he offers me, in whatever shape or form it appears, no matter how frequent or fleeting.

When My Boys Were All Mine

I remember a time when the boys were all mine, 

When morning to dusk, it was just they and I. 

Every moment was ours – just my two boys and me, 

A mom and her sons, running wild and free.

We’d laugh, we’d play, we’d sing through the day,
At home, in the car – all along the way.

To school and to classes, we'd dash to and fro,

From home to Alice, Chiltern or Publika, we'd go, go, go!

Car rides begin with, "What are we listening to today?"
Then a loud Disney singalong, all the way.

A quick park, a mad dash and a crazy run, 
We'd race along the corridors to class – it was fun!

Every two hours, a quick change of venue,

Every night, we'd rush home just to meet curfew.

A shower then dinner, then bedtime at seven, 

Caden hugging my legs, Ethan in my arms – it was heaven.

Whether early or late, whatever the wait,
Always together, no matter the date.
Through every detour, every little delay,
I cherished the moments, every step of the way.

I was their world, just as they were all mine, 

That fleeting season, that sacred moment in time. 

Now echoes remain where chaos once played,

Still deep in my heart, those memories will stay.

Ugh. Meh. Bleh.

Since Wednesday, it’s felt like I’ve been 

trapped on a never-ending carousel – in and out 

of hospitals and clinics, round and round, day after day.

16 April 2025, Wednesday: Ultrasounds + Consult with my Breast Surgeon @ Gleneagles Medical Centre.

17 April 2025, Thursday: Blood tests + X-Ray + Zoladex + Consult with my new Oncologist @ Sunway Medical Centre.

18 April 2025, Friday: My new helper who's been with us 2+ months has always had allergies. But she developed an extra bad allergic reaction to goodness knows what overnight so I brought her over to the pharmacy for some antihistamines in the evening. Unfortunately, it didn't help address the issue. So later that night, we ended up at a nearby clinic pula for her to get shots. 

19 April 2025, Saturday: Uneventful on the medical front today – thank God – but positively perfect on the religious side of things. 🌈✝️ #EasterWeekend 

20 April 2025, Sunday: Brought my helper back to the clinic a second time cos the effectiveness of the shots wore off and her allergies came back. 😮‍💨💉💸 (No more pics cos bo lat and muak already.)

Ugh. It feels like I've not had the chance to really unwind and catch my breath after my hormone therapy, which then leads to lingering tiredness and emoness maximus all weekend and into the new week. I go to bed most nights feeling crummy, emo and sad. 

Zoladex also gives me insomnia to a certain extent. For about a week. These few days in particular, I find myself lying awake in the dark, being unable to sleep, feeling frustrated about lying awake in the dark being unable to sleep 🙄, and just hating everything and nothing at all. Yes, it all but makes sense.

It makes me miss the days when life was simpler – easier. When a steady diet of fast food and roti canai didn't matter, when window shopping was considered exercise, and when the nights were young and the knees were good. 🦵 (Oh yeah, forgot to mention that I also hurt my left knee by accident sometime 2 weeks ago and it hasn't been right since. Sigh.)

I miss my life in KL, I miss the places I used to frequent, I miss the supermarkets, I miss the malls, I miss the highways, I miss my friends, I miss my community – MCKL, CHCKL, USJ9, E0506, #ChilternMoms, #SuperMoms, and of course all the standalone friends that I made along the way – all of it; all of them. I miss it all. 

But here I am. This is life. It is what it is.

Reminder To Self That It Won't Always Be Like This

Came across this beautiful piece of motherly musings on Instagram today and it really resonated with me. Especially now that the kids are growing up and my babies are no longer babies. 

No longer do they gurgle and leave their spit all over my top. No longer do they waddle, slip and fall on their bums. No more do they mumble gibberish I don't understand but smile and respond to anyway. 

They're 7 and 9; going on 8 and 10. How quickly they grow up. How swiftly time flies. I know it's still a long way aways till the day they no longer need me more than I need them. But the day is fast approaching and I feel it in my heart already anyway. 😢

------------

It won’t always be like this. 

I remind myself of this often. 

To help me see through the hard days, but to also pull me into the now. 

Because it’s true. 

They won’t always be this small. 

And I won’t always be this tired. 

They won’t always need me in this way. 

And I won’t always feel this lost. 

They won’t always come to me first. 

And I won’t also feel like I come last. 

This is a season. 

We will move through it together. 

And it will pass before we know it. 

It won’t always be like this. 

And my heart aches as I think about what it may look like. 

The first school drop off. 

The last kiss goodnight. 

The nights up late waiting for a call that doesn’t come. 

Because life will be different one day. 

And it won’t always be this tiring, messy, or beautifully wholesome. 

It will be watching from afar from a clean house, longing for them to come home for a weekend. 

It will be loving them through phone lines, messenger, and the kilometres between us. 

It will be losing myself in something new, to busy my mind from what I’m missing. 

It won’t always be like this. 

Not the hard. 

Or the beautiful.

It will be a different hard and beautiful. 

We won’t always be like this either.

We will age. 

And our relationship will evolve. 

We will be a different type of “us”. 

But this is my one chance at now. 

I only get to love them, be there for them, and be needed in this exact way, once. 

I only get to know this stage of motherhood like the back of my hand, once. 

I only get this time as we are now, once. 

This is it. 

I only get one Motherhood. 

And they only get one childhood. 

This time is ours. 

So I’m breathing it in, in all of its shades, 

Because it just won’t always be like this. 

📖 Words (@wordsof_emmaheaphy), taken from the second book “Mother On” in her early motherhood collection.

Oh Where Oh Where Have My Babies Gone?

#throwback to #29December2014

Oh, how I miss those cuddly baby days. 👶🏻🤱🏻

Build The Bridge To Bridge The Gap

"God doesn’t like our pain either, but His plan for us is better than our just escaping it. 

He wants to heal us and redeem us, providing each of His children with an active hope and eternal comfort. But we can’t always see the ways He’s doing this, and many times we may wonder if we’re still on His agenda at all. This is why we need strength and courage too — to bridge the gap between hurt and healed. 

God tells us to be strong and courageous because He knows we will want to listen to the pain rather than to His promises. He knows we will want to find our own solutions and escape routes, and He understands we will struggle to trust His plan is good when it feels anything but. Our fear is not a surprise to Him, which means He has anticipated it and prepared for it with the gift of His Word. Because of these promises, we can be brave."

– Kaitlin Wernet, from The Book of Comforts

by Caleb Faires, Rebecca Faires,

Kaitlin Wernet, Cymone Wilder.

--------------

We need strength and courage to bridge the gap

between hurt and healed, said she.

WOW. And indeed we do.

Well said and beautifully worded.

For the journey is long, and hard, and tough, and tiring. Sometimes, painful; often, lonely. So yes, having walked a short mile on this path the Lord has set me on, I have to agree – strength and courage is the name of this wretched game. 

I think I took my first diagnosis moderately well.

I accepted my fate, trusted my doctors, did everything that was prescribed, and adapted to life as a survivor. I praised God throughout and was pretty calm about the whole situation, believing that what we were doing would be enough to keep Cancer at bay and that this was a one-off occurrence that we could put behind us after I was done with treatment. But then...

During a scheduled 6-month CT the moment I was done

with my year-long treatment plan, they found a new lump.

Another biopsy and a stressfully long wait later,

our worst fears were confirmed and had come back to haunt us

– the cancer had semi returned in the form of a DCIS.

During this time, I went through a handful of bluesy days. I was downcast and depressed. To sum it up in a word, what I felt then was hopelessness. But God brought our SIBKL cell, Faithful Friends, into my life for such a time as this. They arranged a Spirit-led Zoom call that shook me up, lifted my spirit, and brought me back from the horrible depths of hopeless desolation. 

It was after that that my perspective shifted.

I now believe that the fight with Cancer is ultimately an endurance game. A test of mental, physical and spiritual stamina. An Ironman multi-athlon of sorts, which puts your body, mind and spirit through the ultimate test of grit, tenacity, determination, long-suffering, patience, and perseverance. 

How many times can you get back up again when avalanche after avalanche of bad news hits often and hard, when wave after wave of physical suffering and pain tries its best to knock you down, and when tsunami after tsunami of medical bills attempt to financially drown you? How many times can you just. keep. on. going? How many times must you keep on going?

The answer is – Every. Single. Time.

It's not enough to be positive, joyful and faithful the first time around. You have to get into the right mindset every single day. BUT... how do you slay negativity, find joy and keep the faith in the thick of tribulation? When faced with sickness, pain, suffering, and possibly even death? 

Well, it's not easy, I'll tell you that.

But it's not impossible.

How can I be so sure? 

Because God is good. And He is faithful. And His Word tells us that He will not let us be tempted beyond what we can bear. AND EVEN WHEN – not if but WHEN, says the Bible – we are tempted at some point or another – to give up, to give in and to just surrender and quit (it's true, I've been there 😔) – the beauty of it all is that He will also provide a way out so that we can endure it (1 Corinthians 10:13).

Your job, as you wait upon the Lord,

is to be strong and courageous (1 Chronicles 22:13),

not lose heart, and make this season of renewal and purification

for the sake of eternity really count (2 Corinthians 4:16-17).

However tough, trying, demotivating and difficult your situation right now, remember: Your suffering is never in vain. God is using your pain for a purpose – to mould you, shape you and refine you. To get you from where you are, to where you should be. More importantly, to bridge the gap between who you are and who you should be. 

Whatever you're going through, the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords has deemed you able. And if He thinks you can do it, cummon! You. can. do. it! Fight the good fight and finish the race having kept the faith (2 Timothy 4:7)! The best part of it all is that you don't have to do it alone. For His promise is that He will never leave you nor forsake you. 

God gives His toughest battles to

His strongest soldiers. And don't worry.

He never abandons them on the battleground, ok.

So, friend... as you brave this fight with cancer, remember that you. are. not. alone. He is with you and for you, so nothing can be against you (Romans 8:31). And if you're a survivor and need a friend to pray and journey along with you, write me.

Then & Now

Now that a year has passed and old wounds have healed, my perception of my chemo downtime has also changed. Instead of remembering 5 months of IVs, swollen veins, bruising, nausea, indigestion, tiredness, loneliness and involuntary isolation, I now look back on those days quite fondly. 

I remember keeping to myself for the most part of every day. Just waking, lazing, eating, sleeping, showering, listening to music, watching mukbang videos, reading the Bible and even just staring into space and zoning out until I fall asleep in my room. Rinse and repeat; day in and day out. 

I’d spend hours picking up and sorting out the hair I’d lost, too. It was surreal and cathartic to feel the loose strands in my hands, attached to nothing. I remember thinking about how slippery hair actually is. The smoothness of every fibre. But only from one direction; coarse from the other. 

I did this every night. Patiently. Painstakingly. Diligently. I’d align every strand, tie them together with a rubber band and put them away in a box – storing them for goodness knows what. Just me clinging on to some semblance of my past before Life did a 180º and landed me where I was – sick and sitting in a room all alone, sorting fallen hair. It was mind-numbing work. But very therapeutic all the same. 

I miss that monotony now.

The quiet. The solitude.

The peace in my heart.

Finding peace has been difficult lately;

this weekend, especially.

I feel frustrated. Easily irritated. Fed up with everything. I’m angry. I’m also angry that I’m angry. At what, I do not know. I’m sad. Depressed. I feel this great unhappiness hanging over my head and weighing down my heart. Unhappiness over what? Everything and nothing. 

A super long, extra steaming hot shower helps relax me somewhat. Watching Korean dramas on Netflix offer some relief, too. Blogging, even more so. But then... it’s always fleeting. Because one cannot shower, Netflix and blog forever. 

Hang Up The Phone?

So there I am, sitting down just chilling out alone in my hospital room, on my hospital bed, when I look at my phone and realise I missed JJ's video call. Tried calling him back but couldn't. That's when this chat ensued.

And this is how you know you're old. 😅

Having said that, I'm really glad that both boys are now able to read and write. And that they have their own Messenger Kids accounts to text and call us anytime. Loving this aspect of modern technology. Especially now that I'll be away from home for awhile.

Finding Hope With Faithful Friends

God has truly blessed us with good friends during our time in KL. One group of such friends is our SIBKL cell group, who are aptly named Faithful Friends.

Because faithful friends they truly are.

I was feeling pretty out of it since my biopsy on Tuesday. Disconnected and disinterested with things. Overall just down and depressed. I was also nursing a bad headache and just wanted to shut out the world and go to bed by 8pm.

But Faithful Friends core group asked for a Zoom call to pray with us tonight at 9pm so... paiseh ma. People ask to pray for you then you reject – how can right?? So I ma said, ok lor. Just out of obligation and paiseh-ness. 😅

But deep down in my heart,

I was actually dragging my tiny little ticker feet

over having to "meet" people and tired of having to

verbalise my sad sob situation all over again. 😣

It started with me explaining what was going on to the cosy group of 9 leaders, with The Husband by my side. When asked how I felt, I confessed aloud for the very first time – I feel... less hopeful this time around. 😔 #letsbehonest

They listened quietly.

Then one by one,

they took turns to uphold us in prayer.

Some cried, I cried. It was a real sob fest when we started. 😂 But midway through, the spirit shifted. The heaviness lifted. God spoke to me through his people and I was reminded to be happy. And joyful. And to fill myself with laughter instead of sadness.


The Zoom call ended on a high note. My head was still pounding... but my spirit was lifted from the outpouring of love and care from these people who – to be honest – are no longer obligated to shepherd and care for us, now that we've left KL. Our cell leader even told us:

"You see la. I ask everybody for core meeting,

everybody say tonight cannot. Suddenly I said,

"Core, let's pray for Pam," everybody is online."

LOL.

I feel so fortunate and grateful to have friends who will rally around me like this in times when I am weak and my spirit is downcast. Truly, I am blessed. ❤️

Photo taken during our KL farewell organised by Faithful Friends

@ Italia & Ribs, Plaza Damas on 20 July 2019.

Happy Food

I need me some happy food

after being shot in the boob three times.

Back in the day, it would have been a McDonald's Double Cheeseburger (Plain) Value Meal. Up till mid-2019, it would have been a zesty, greasy Coke & Fries combo at Plan B, Publika. Today, it's this:

Cheesy Quesadillas @ Kafka.

A VEGETARIAN quesadilla with a side of salad, no less! But I still have more growing up to do la. It's still greasy and I left more than half that salad. Haha. Give me some time, ok. Bagi chan a bit please. 

Designing Brand Identity By Alina Wheeler

Eight pages in and I'm loving this book so far. 👍

I'm learning lots and it feels good to update my knowledge after being away from actively immersing myself in the advertising / marketing / branding industry for awhile. (Freelance Copywriting doesn't really make me feel like I'm a part of the creative community, if you ask me. No agency life, no kick la. 😆)


Sometimes I can't believe that I'd sidelined my career and have actually dedicated almost eight years of my life to motherhood. I guess when you're busy, you really don't have time to check the clock (or the calendar. 😆) But I must admit – while focusing on growing and nurturing my little family is fulfilling in its own way, I do miss the excitement, pace and buzz of agency life. 

But jumping back into the game after so long seemed like an uphill task. I felt like the extent of my knowledge was a decade behind time. And although I think I've got a good gut for these things and am quick enough on my feet to adapt to the changes that have taken place, I still wanted the data, the methodologies and the tried-and-tested, proven-to-work processes industry experts have come up with over the years to steer and guide our community.

That's where Wheeler comes in.

And so the studying begins...

You know, I once considered taking a Masters or a second degree in Psychology. Many years back circa 2007. Or was it 2010? Hmmm. My memory fails me. #chemobrain Anyway, fast-forward to life after kids and I eventually stopped seeing myself going back to school, be it part time or full time. Just... no, thank you; I'm done. 😅 

But now, I think I was looking at the whole idea of studying wrongly. You see, I still don't think I'm cut out for a life of cramming for tests and rushing assignments at this point in my life. But gaining knowledge is a lifelong process. And self improvement through lifelong learning appeals to me greatly. Also, the subject of BRANDING very much relates to my previous field of study and interest.

And that's why I'm actually happy doing this.

 

Notes I took from key learnings gained from

Designing Brand Identity By Alina Wheeler, Pages 1-8.

Guai guai sit down thak chek. 🤓

Notes From @kenny.kenray's 1st Live Interview On Instagram

Check out his IG account here!

It's been awhile since I've doodled. 😊

I used to take sermon notes this way back in the day before smartphones and online sermons. Not sure where those notebooks have gone though. 🤔 They somehow got lost in my many moves around Penang, Selangor and KL. 😢 

Anyway, it felt really good to use my hands again

and go back to exercising my creative muscles. 💪

Storytime With Kong Kong – The Kampung Boy From Kedah

I grew up hearing stories of days gone by from my dad. Whenever I was in bed by 10.00pm, I was rewarded with a story. And each time, the story would begin in the exact same way... 

"Behind my house was a paddy field...

Behind the paddy field was a rubber estate...

And behind the rubber estate were some train tracks."

I enjoyed hearing all about how he caught fighting fishes and trained them to fight and win. About how he rigged his rubber seeds with candle wax so he could crack his opponents' seeds effortlessly. How he caught spiders amongst the trees and let them fight to the death. And how he (very dangerously) put nails and stones on the train tracks so they would go flying all around when the trains sped by. #donttrythisathomekids

Having said all that,

I'm so glad that last night,

the boys listened to their very first

kampung-boy story from Kong Kong.

Updated storytime experience for a very visual and tech-savvy next gen, of course, with YouTube videos of fighting fishes jumping out of the water and attacking each other, for added effect. 🙄

Lau Gin Na: It's All In The Name

I was feeling a little worn out so thoughtful Ethan insisted that I should go lie down. He decided to grab his Samsung Galaxy Tab A to play me a relaxing song on YouTube. "To help you rest," he says. How sweet. ☺️ I was wondering which song he would choose and half expected to hear Intentions from the speakers cos he's had #BieberFever for awhile now – #kidsthesedays 😅 – but to my surprise, he picked this one:

   

"Goodnight to you. Goodnight to me.

Now close your eyes and go to sleep.

Goodnight. Sleep tight. Sweet dreams tonight.

Goodnight. I love you."

I was familiar with this video and it totally brought back memories of days gone by. The boys probably don't remember it by now but I used to play them this video when they were younger. Nostalgic, I started singing along to the relaxing tune and this conversation ensued...

JJ: Wait. What? You know this song?!?

Pam Song: *dramatically* I know ALLL the songs, Baby.

JJ: *eyes wide like saucers* What?!?

Pam Song: *matter-of-fact tone* That’s why I’m called Pam Song ma.

JJ: *thoughtfully* Ohhhh!!

Pam Song: 😂😂😂

I may not have gotten any rest,

but I definitely felt better after this. ❤️

There Are Two Types Of Women

The first type considers the Movement Control Order – more fondly known as MCO – as the perfect time to pamper themselves with face masks, body spas, DIY mani-pedis and self massages. These women will come out of this lockdown season looking like a million bucks, all rosy, radiant and rested.

And then there's the second type who thinks:

"Heck it la. Ain't goin' nowhere; ain't nobody seeing me now.

Why waste a good bottle of face cream on a whole month in??" 

I might have had a little bit of the spunk and spirit of the former back in my early to mid-20s to pamper myself and pretty up at home for just no reason at all... but no points for guessing which type of woman I am now. Oh how my 30s has changed me. Or is it motherhood? Hmmm. 🤔🤭

Random Finds Along King Street & Church Street

Public payphone with coin AND prepaid card slot.

Spotted this while walking back to the car after our Tong Christmas cum Birthday Lunch @ Reve and just HAD to take a picture. My kids have never seen a payphone before! Sure, it's missing the most important thing that would indicate that it's a phone in the first place but... hey, that's what Mommy is for. 

Ring ring! 📞

This foreboding staircase sat right opposite the payphone.

And diagonally across the street...

Melsong and I being touristy.

Although I'm a Penang Lang, I've never taken a picture with any of these decals before. They were only erected in recent years, after all. (I is old.) You know what... After I'm done with treatment, Imma take the kids on a stroll along the Penang Heritage Trail. How can Penangite no see and no know Penang, right??

My Happy Little Chef

I got to spend some quality time alone with JJ this morning while The Husband brought JZ out for Football ECA at school. I wanted to make myself some scrambled eggs on toast and asked if he would like to join me and help me make it. Of course, my little kaypochee jumped at the opportunity to get his hands dirty in the kitchen. No hesitation whatsoever.

Le Grains sun-dried tomato bread in the toaster,

kampung eggs broken into bowls and lightly seasoned,

and there's JJ on the counter, all ready to beat some eggs.

I showed JJ how to make scrambled eggs by making mine first. Dumped the eggs into the pan and started stirring till they were done. He watched, paid close attention and listened to my instructions. After that, I left him to make his own. 

And... here we go!

STIR! STIR! STIR! DON'T STOP STIRRING!!! 😂

And... tadaaaaa!!

The beaming chef with his first plate of scrambled eggs on toast.

Look at that smile. He was so, so happy with what he had achieved! And I was so, so proud of him! He did an excellent job. 👏👍💪 Ok la. My work here is done. From now on, JJ will be our family's breakfast chef. 😆 #cucitangan #passingonthebaton

Yum yum. Chef approved!

All in all, I think my little boy had fun spending time with his mommy. And I'm really glad we got to do this together cos I've really missed spending alone time with him, too. 😘 

You see, back when we were still in KL, JJ finished school at 12pm daily, while JZ finished school at 2pm on days without ECA. That meant that I had at least 2 hours of alone time with JJ every. single. day. from the time he started preschool at CH at 2y4m until 5 July 2019 when we officially left AS.

That's 2 hours alone with mommy – without Kor Kor or Papa around to compete for attention – 5 days a week, for 2 years and 11 months of his 5 years of being alive. Quite a significant amount of time for a child, if you ask me. (And this doesn't even include JZ's ECA extra time in school and the 1.5-hour alone time that we get when JZ is at The Little Secret and he's not!)

In those 2 precious hours during mid-day, we'd eat, catch up, talk, cook noodles, make jelly, play games, watch videos, sing songs, go shopping, and do other random nonsense together. We even went to RedBox for karaoke buffet together before. 🎤 Just the two of us. Twice, I think! LOL!

So yes, coming back to Penang, going to a new school, living in a new home, and dealing with cancer has brought many changes for JJ and I. But one of the biggest changes is the reduction of alone time that we get to spend together. I must remember to create more pockets of precious moments like these for him and JZ, too. I want to continue to be one of the reasons they smile like this:

Heidi From SIBKL Friends Cell Family Comes To Town

Wah, I feel super happening these couple of days. But it's all been with people from KL who've come to visit. Hahaha. (Still haven't accumulated any Penang kaki cos I'm anti-social like that. 😅😂)


Heidi is another ex-college-mate-turned-ex-church-member friend. She happened to be in our sister cell at SIBKL so we're in one or two mutual chat groups. She missed our epic Faithful Friends cell farewell at Italia & Ribs, Plaza Damas back in July so when she came up to Penang for work, she called for a quick catch up!


Speaking of farewells, I should really blog about that epic farewell for memory's sake. It was a beautiful night of food, fun and friendship, and we felt so loved by our church family in SIBKL. ❤️ Special shoutout to girlfriends, Ah Lan and Christabel, for their amazing effort! 👯‍♀️


Truly that cell was instrumental in making our recent years in KL so much more joyful, wholesome and fulfilling. (We were only with FFC for 2.5 years.) It also made it infinitely more difficult for us to leave. 😢 We made some really good friends, and the boys did, too. I guess it helps that the cell is overrun with boy kids lah. All of us either have 2 boys or 3 boys. EACH! 🤪

FFC farewell on 20 July 2019 @ Italia & Ribs, Plaza Damas.

Ok, now I remember why I put off blogging this event.

It's just too much work. Too many kids to censor! 😅😂

Anyhoo, my catch-up with Heidi was super short and sweet. I dropped the kids off for class, rushed over to pick her from her hotel, we grabbed drinks at Coffee Bean, then I had to go get the kids already before dropping her back at her hotel so the kids could make it back home in time for dinner. Like Amazing Race Asia. LOL. Social life just has to take a backseat to #momlife – that's the reality, folks!

My K-Drama Journey

Growing up, I had only watched "Winter Sonata" and "Autumn In My Heart". (Song Hye Kyo really doesn't age!!) And that was waaaay back during my high school years – during the days of VCDs and boxy TVs. My Ah Ma's helper took a liking to them and bought the VCD box sets to bring home to Indonesia, which I borrowed and binge-watched before she went back. 😅😂


My next venture into the K world came circa 2017/2018 when The Husband suggested we watch Train To Busan (2016) on Netflix one night. It was a one-off. We thought it was pretty good but we went back to English movies and sitcoms after that. But then, something happened. More and more Korean dramas started popping up on my Netflix page. 😳

Then one day, I saw this image

that made me decide to click:

And that was when it happened. I would say that I officially picked up watching Korean dramas when Netflix started screening "Something In The Rain" back in 2018. After that, I just fell into that endless black hole called K-drama and never found my way out. Haha. Since then, I've watched a "few" others. This be the full list in the order in which I watched them:

1. Something In The Rain (2018)
2. Goblin a.k.a Guardian: The Lonely and Great God (2016-2017)
3. Big (2012)
4. Coffee Prince (2007)
5. Finding Mr Destiny (2010)
6. My Love From The Star (2014)
7. Oh My Venus (2015-2016)
8. Master's Sun (2013)
9. Strong Girl Bong Soon (2017)
10. Oh My Ghost (2015)
11. What's Wrong With Secretary Kim (2018)
12. Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo (2016)
13. Descendants Of The Sun (2016)
14. Hwarang: The Poet Warrior Youth (2016-2017)
15. Nice Guy a.k.a The Innocent Man (2012)
16. Healer (2014-2015)
17. Suspicious Partner (2017)
18. Remember (2015-2016)
19. Hyde, Jekyll, Me (2015)
20. Kingdom (2019)
21. She Was Pretty (2015)
22. I'm Not A Robot (2017-2018)
23. Strongest Deliveryman (2017)
24. The Heirs (2013)
25. Touch Your Heart (2019)

It's been about a year since then and now,

I've just started "Her Private Life" (2019).

I have to admit, I struggled through some of them. Namely, "Coffee Prince", "My Love From The Star", "Nice Guy" a.k.a "The Innocent Man", "Hyde, Jekyll, Me" and "The Heirs". Granted, most of these I've mentioned aren't very new so I guess they're outliers in my list because the standard of K-drama has improved significantly since then. Anything before 2010, just don't bother. Cannot make it.


Why do I like Korean dramas? They do romance really well. And not in a lame, corny kinda way. They're just really, really good at developing love stories. In one episode, you can laugh, cry and get angry. Hahaha. Lighting and soundtrack also unbeatable. People raved over Crazy Rich Asians but guess what? I watched it and thought, "Yerrr... so B-grade wan. All my K-dramas have better make-up, better lighting, better acting and better supporting soundtrack." 😂 #truestory


So yes. If you haven't tried watching Korean dramas and you've got nothing else to watch on TV since "Game of Thrones" is over and "Stranger Things" hasn't re-started, go watch! These are my top recommendations in no particular order:


1. Goblin a.k.a Guardian: The Lonely and Great God (2016-2017) – fantasy, romance, comedy

2. Descendants Of The Sun (2016) – drama, romance, comedy

3. What's Wrong With Secretary Kim (2018) – comedy, romance

4. Strong Girl Bong Soon (2017) – comedy, action, fiction

5. I'm Not A Robot (2017-2018) – drama, comedy, romance

6. Oh My Venus (2015-2016) – comedy, romance

7. Healer (2014-2015) – drama, action, romance

8. Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo (2016) – drama, comedy

You can thank me later. 😘

What Makes A Child's "Best Day"?

Last Saturday, JJ and I spent the most part of the morning together while JZ and The Husband continued sleeping. We woke up super early (actually HE woke up early and forced me to wake up, too 😒) and he presented me with a special request to make pancakes together. "I will help you, Mommy!" he said, and ran off to get a stool.

And so I made pancakes with my little helper.

Then we both sat down and had a little

pancake breakfast bonding.

Look at that smile! 😁 Bright as the sun. 🌞

He exclaimed, "This is the best day of my life!" as he wolfed down the pancakes. And it a-l-m-o-s-t made me feel like waking up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday was worth it. Almost. HAHAHAHA. #Ineedmysleep

Thing is... today, I was reminded just how important making memories with our children is. See, I had forgotten all about his comment about this being "the best day of his life". And it was only during a conversation with Mee that I was reminded of it. She mentioned him saying it and I went, "Huh?? When?" 

5 days later and I had forgotten all about it. 😔 

You see, to me, that morning was just about putting breakfast on the table and getting JJ fed with as little fuss as possible. Sure, I snapped a pic to remember the moment. But that was because I liked just how happy he looked and wanted to save that smile forever. It was about him. His breakfast, his smile, his happiness.

But I guess that I forgot that I contributed to that happiness! Precious time spent making memories with Mommy. Amidst the hustle and bustle of everyday life and motherhood, I need to remember that the simple, little, everyday things we do with our kids matter, too. And I should do my best to let them have their "best day" every day. ❤️ #learningtobeabettermomeveryday