Remember my post on wedding bells last week? *click
here to read* Well, it got me thinking a little and I've been on a personal silent-research project since. And today, I've decided that I shall finally REVEAL THE RESULT OF MY RESEARCH!!!
Pay attention.
My finding is shocking but true, so sit tight
and make sure you don't fall off your seats.
A shift has taken place, ladies and gentlemen! In this modern world we live in, it's now the MEN who want to get married first.
JENG JENG JENG.
A friend of mine has her bf talking about marriage after just 2 or 3 months into the relationship. I mean, like, hello. You order car also cannot come in three months, okay. Here's you're expressing your undying love and a lifetime together already? Wow. Those
are premature thoughts. BUT... it's good to know that the guy's the marrying kind (or a sweet talker). And it's always nice to know that the person he sees a future with, is the woman he's with. (Why date when there's no intention to marry, right?)
I'm not the kind of girl who
gila mau kahwin wan lor. I mean, if it's the right guy, at the right time, for the right reasons, then... sure. Why not? You know you're going to spend the rest of your lives together already anyways. So why not let forever begin sooner? But I know of many girls who just wanna get married. No matter what. With no matter whom. So salah.
But that's besides the point.
We're talking about men now.
I did a quick check with my wedded colleagues and all of them (female) have said that when they were proposed to, they weren't aware that their men were looking at marriage already (but of course, they said,
"Yes," and shed tears of joy during the proposal anyways lah). One even received her proposal after only a year and a half of dating! (Actually, I think a year and a half is okay lah if both are already working. Date too long not healthy wan.)
Now this discovery actually birthed a second leg to my research and I then went about trying to understand WHY these men weren't as commitment phobic as TV always tells us men are. The following are some possible reasons:
1. A marriage no longer implies a signing off of all his worldly goods. Believe you me, men work really hard to reach their dream of becoming the next Warren Buffett. They save and invest and save and invest with hopes that the zeros in their bank account multiply in the shortest time possible. So since (most) women also work nowadays, marriage no longer comes in the way of men achieving that dream. (No matter what you choose to believe, money is still a factor lah, okay? Even in love.) That way, it makes it easier for them to choose to commit.
2. A man needs a home keeper. Most men move out of their family homes when they enter the working world. And in this case, having a wife around really helps considering what pigs most men are. With a little extra loving, your woman will gladly wash, cook, clean, vacuum and care for you. All you need to do is love her! Hello, worth it or not, I ask you??? Get maid also more expensive lah. And trust me... men always do their Math. If commitment means a well kept home filled with love, no wonder they're all going for it.
3. A man knows that time is money. And if you're not living together, all that traveling time means money!!! Time on the road is time you can put to use more productively if you had a life and a home together. Marriage means no more getting stuck in peak hour jams so you can go home, shower and head off to see your darling in time for dinner. It also means no more late night drives and worrisome sleeping hours cos there won't be any 'going home' after you've had your night out together. You'll be going to bed WITH her. Can tidur terus already. And more sleep means optimal working performance, right? See, it's good for your career, too! Plus, imagine the money you'd save on petrol. (Eh, petrol prices going up again ah?)
4. Men want the security of knowing that others know that their woman is officially (and legally) off the market. With women being so 'out there' at the workplace nowadays, there's really no limit to the number guys she meets on the job. Hence, having a ring or a band around her finger does wonders in keeping buzzing flies at bay. It may not be a fail proof plan, but it helps big time. (Of course, depending on your girl and her manner of interaction with the guys she hangs out with lah. Cos if she
memang damn kau
miang, nothing in the world is going to help.)
5. It's easier to even think about getting married when you know that both parties will be contributing to the wedding expenses. Weddings don't come cheap these days and of course, if you're going to get married only ONCE in this lifetime, I'm sure you'll want to make it a day to remember. And memorable days usually cost more than your average day, right? So with women working, it's going to be much easier making that day a reality. Sure, if it's 'a guy thing' to pay for most of the expenses, then by all means, go ahead. But I'm sure there are things she can help out with without bruising your manly ego. Like say, her gowns. Or her accessories. Or flowers. Or keepsakes for the guests. Whatever lah. As long as you know she's totally in it with you... with her bank account, too.
6. Men know that ten ten ten means uh uh uh. With the
True Love Waits movement, religious teachings and all that, more and more women around the world are keeping themselves sexually abstinent before marriage. And men being men, well... need I say more?
7. The male's worldview on marriage and love has changed. No longer are men just looking for a spouse to play maid and to produce babies. They're also looking for somebody to love. And
manja. And
ayang. And they also want somebody who can love,
manja and
ayang them back unconditionally, too! They want connection and mutual affection with their marriage. Not just a baby factory and a maid.
8. Men find that their woman is their 'secret place'. And they like it. Being the alpha male at the workplace can be trying and tiring at times. Always having to be so tough and in control all the time. It's not easy. So it's always nice to be able to go home to that secret place where
you can be babied and taken care of every single day of your life. In her arms where you can relax and just be yourself. No pretenses. No trying to impress the people around you. And yet, you find that the person still loves you no matter what, understands what your going through and supports you as you go through it.
These are mere speculations on my part
but I think I made some sense.
Love the back detailing. Snitched this pic offa bridal mag I read at Add Audio last month.
Editing has been done, though. As always. =p