Operasi Train Jantan: Part 18

Hey ya boys. It's been awhile.
I hope you've missed me...

'Cos I'm back.

*imagine super rocker music plays here*

Haha. Alrighty then. Enough with the compulsory introductions, let's dive head-first into the terror parts, okay?

The topic of discussion today:

Say what you mean and mean what you say.
And if you ain't got nothin' nice to say,
don't say nothin' at all.

Tone of voice, choice of words and manner of speaking – all three play separate but equally as integral parts in ensuring healthy and constructive conversation between two parties. When one goes Southwards, everything else goes haywire. That's just the way it goes.

It's like a three-legged stool.

As long as all three legs are equally as long and equally as strong as the other, the chair remains steady and upright. But all that can change in the blink of an eye. A single shorter leg will disrupt the delicate balance those three legs have collectively created and that will inevitably result in a rocking stool.


So, when you say things you don't mean in an argument, in ways you don't mean when you say them, it no longer matters whether or not you meant them. The bottom line is that you said them anyways. And that, my male friends is a big time stool-shaker.


Let's be realistic about it. Nothing expressed in anger ever sounds better than it's meant to sound, right? So that kinda means that Tone of Voice is already a big enough problem to begin with. Controlling the highs and lows and ups and downs in your voice when you're stressed, frustrated, angered, or even super excited isn't rocket science but we all struggle with it.


Same goes for Manner of Speaking. Sometimes, we say things in ways that hurt the people we talk to. And sometimes, we're insensitive enough to go on and on in that same manner for hours on end without even stopping for quick breaths in between. Rude responses and accusatory comments should well be avoided. Know that it is especially hurtful when an argument is conducted in a shamefully discourteous manner.


And when it comes to Choice of Words, I think it's a no-brainer that takes so much conscious effort it actually tires the speaker out mentally. But it's SO necessary. I personally feel that the world lacks people who possess the ability to get their point across... and nothing more. Who fight for their cause and stand up for their rights... while using tactful words to soften the blow and lessen the hurt. After all, you initially got into that argument because you aimed to get your point across, right? So, why go all out to hurt the person, too? A bit tukar topik, salah channel di, right?


The use of 'right' words in an argument is of utmost importance. It pays to be politically correct lah, okay. Why? Cos what you say is what leaves a lasting effect, if you DON'T. Even after the fight is over and the argument's done with, if you've said something wrong or hurtful, the person you said it to is always left to live with the haunting memory of believing that they are what you say they are when you were angered.

"You're so useless!"
"Go away! You disgust me!"
"Why are you so stupid?!"

Words like these ring in the ears of the receiver long after you've both ended the fight. And despite what people tell you, know this: 'sorry' doesn't cut it. It just doesn't. And you should also know that girls know (What!? You think we stupid ah?) that excuses like, "I didn't mean it that way," and, "I just said it cos I'm angry and not cos I really meant it," are lame-ass methods a desperate man will use to save his sorry arse from the wrath of his scorned woman. And don't you dare give us the, "You should know wat! I where got think you liddat wan?" Well, YOU should know that you crossed sacred lines when you said the things you said.


Bottom line is this: it doesn't matter what you say after lah, okay? None of it takes away any of the pain you've inflicted. It just shows your lack of consideration for the feelings of the person you were upset with. Whether or not you're being deliberately rude, or just being ignorant to the basic rules of human social behaviour, what's said is said. Thing is, you don't pay the price. The person you've said it to does.


So boys, be tactful... even when you're angered. It goes a long way. Because when you don't, it also goes a long way. I've had my say. I now leave you with wise words of the great Thumper from Bambi: -

"If you can't say nothin' nice,
don't say nothin' a' all."

Peace out.

*pause*

*pause*

*pause*

*guilty*

*frowns*

Okay, fine. I'll play fair.
Girls often shake stools, too.
Are ya happy now!?

*sulks*


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Read Operasi Train Jantan: Part 1, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 2,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 3, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 4,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 5, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 6,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 7, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 8,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 9, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 10,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 11, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 12,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 13, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 14,
Operasi Train Jantan: Part 15, Operasi Train Jantan: Part 16
and Operasi Train Jantan: Part 17 that's somewhere in cyberspace
(sorry lah, I can't for the life of me link this post) first if you
haven't read them yet and you'll soon understand what I'm getting at.