The Week After Chemo

So I rocked the first day after chemo like a superstar 💃

...then totally crashed and burned like a loser after that. 😅😂

I thought I was doing well. I ate well. I gave myself a second haircut. My spirits were up. I even went for a nice, long walk at Botanical Gardens with The Husband and the kiddos in the evening. I felt heroic. Strong. Invincible! 💪💪💪

Then, I woke up the morning after that

and my world turned upside down. 

The next 3 days that followed were TORTURE – that’s Day 2, 3 and 4 after chemo. All food just turned me off and I had zero cravings whatsoever. Problem was, I also felt hungry a lot of the time. Like on-the-verge-of-gastritis kind of hungry. Hungry but cannot eat. So for 3 days, I mainly moped around and battled nausea, indigestion and cramps 24/7. Was super tired, too. Maybe cos of chemo, maybe cos cannot eat so no energy. Who knows, man. All I know is that time, really can die.

The only way I can sum it up is this:
Post-cancer treatment really kills you to heal you.

No kidding.

So, I've decided to rework my Suffering Scale to:

1. The Days Post-Chemo
2. Sinusitis
3. Cancer 

Today is Day 6 post chemo and I’m still not 100% myself but at least I’m feeling a little better. Can finally eat a bit more although some other side effects are suddenly creeping in, wreaking havoc on my body. 🤦🏻‍♀️ My heart feels like it's racing half the time and breathing feels shallow and unsatisfying. Ugh. Sien.


Seriously though, it’s not Cancer that kills the body and the spirit. It’s the treatment to make sure you never die of cancer that does. Really ironic, huh? What’s supposed to keep you alive is what’s killing you. Ugh. I'm so not looking forward to the next 5 sessions.