WARNING: This post is not for the faint-hearted or weak-spirited. MAJOR (Bold, Italic, Underlined and CAPITALISED – don't mess, I mean business) pissy-girl rant ahead. Consider yourself forewarned.
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I don't stress much
so stop stressing me out.
I compartmentalise well for a girl. That's why I don't stress about things as much as some other girlies I know do. My day at work may suck but when I'm finally at home, work's the last thing on my mind. So, STOP BRINGING IT UP! It doesn't console me one bit. In fact, it only makes work feel like potty paper stuck on my shoe that just refuses to lose itself. Start talking about how pathetic my work-life balance is or how pitiful my situation is, and you'd have officially ruined my time out of work
and my day tomorrow.
I also don't stress about situations that cannot be turned around or about things I no longer have control over. Examples: (1) When
I left my passport at home and realised it on my way to the airport, I was so matter-of-fact that the boys who were with me didn't take me seriously for awhile; (2) When
my comp got stolen, I called my folks to notify them of the break-in and made a police report. No freaking out, no panicking, no fuss, zero drama – just the way I like it. A friend who was with me told me that he'd be freaking out already if he was in my position. Well, I'm not much of a freaker-outer so...
It would really help if you stopped stressing me out with mindless questions about the things you only
perceive to be my problems based on what you read online. I blog my stresses away so I sleep soundly at night. That's why what you guys usually see are my rants. My AMPLIFIED rants, no less. That also means that when you bug me about my daily rants via SMS, phone or email (blog post comments are different – will explain later), you're REMINDING me of my stresses. Stop it. It's annoying as hell.
I don't need your help
so stop trying to play the hero.
I may be a single girl in a big city, but I've survived the city on my own for the past 8 years so I'm perfectly capable to taking care of myself – physically... and emotionally.
Especially in the emotional department, in fact. If I do need your help, your ear, or your shoulder, you will hear from me. Otherwise, leave me alone.
I wasn't built with a need for emotional crutches (i.e. your counsel, sympathy or pity). Especially not from people whom I'm not close enough to or have no respect for. Thanks, but no thanks. Go cradle somebody else instead. I'll do just fine with my family, my partner (if I had one) and my small circle of friends whom I know will pick up should their phone go ringing.
I know exactly what I'm looking for in a partner
so if you think you'll be able to change my mind
about men and my ideals, you're grossly mistaken.
I also know that in a day, a month or even half a year, I won't be able to tell if you're going to turn out to be him. I may make friends easily. But I don't fall in love quite as quickly. It takes longer than 6 months to build a solid friendship, what more a full-fledged 3D vision of the future with kids and white picket fences?
Plus, it takes a hell of a lot more that a few outings to know if you've got a friendship that won't burn if you melt it down with passion. One that you can then carefully mold into a relationship and fill with love. You see, I'm all for taking time to get to know potential partners better. In fact, I think that it's necessary. Especially with me. I knew my first love interest for 15 years before anything sparked and I knew my ex-boyfriend for 10 years before we got together. Think you'll be able to sweep me off my feet in just a couple of months? Think again.
Sure, it'd be nice to have someone along for the ride. But that doesn't mean I'm going to fall for every waiter I think is cute. (Go eat at Kim Gary Sunway Pyramid. Got one guy there quite hot. =p) Take it slow. Make it steady. Overnight romances aren't my thing. And for goodness sakes, if you find that I'm not responding well to your efforts, put your finger on the Pause button. Stop before
I start running. And FYI, when I run, I (usually) never look back.
I need my space
so stop suffocating me.
Friends who've known me for awhile know that I go MIA sometimes. Not because I've chucked the friendship, mind you. If anything, I only put it in hibernation till the next time friendship Spring comes along. So, don't emo with me, drama with me or kick up a fuss when I fail to entertain. It'll only annoy me and cause me to
want to throw away what we've got. This MIA-ness isn't personal. It isn't you. (Although sometimes, it is.) Just consider our Friendship Downtime a dependent variable to my Me Time.
I have no problems maintaining friendships that last a lifetime. I have a handful of such friendships and I treasure them. But I do have an issue with friendships that overwhelm. You see, I'm a girl who needs her space. I like hanging out, having fun and all that. But I also like a healthy amount of Me Time to recharge. So stop hounding me whether or not it's in person, online or over the phone. It suffocates me. Plus, the more you bug, the more I want to reach for a fly swatter.
My time is precious so stop making me
waste it on pointless nonsense.
I'd like to spend my time on things and people that make me happy. On things and people who will enrich my life. So if you're not going to make me a happier/better person, leave. If your SMS/chat message/PM/email is going to irritate me or cause me to frown, don't double click my name. And don't expect a reply. If your telephone conversation isn't going to put a smile on my face, don't call. I probably won't even pick up when I see your name flashing. I've had enough of people draining me of my joy.
It's time I invested in the right people. Because it's not always about me. It's about (some of) you, too. If you're someone I consider a friend, I'd like to spend whatever little leftover time from my miserable 24-hours on you. (If you have to ask if you're that person, you're probably not.) If you need me, you know I'll be there. No matter what. For now, and for always.
