Tuesday, August 05, 2008

The Simplicity Of Giving Love

Was reading through my earlier post on love (I often re-read the stuff I write to further assess my situation and process my thoughts) and the Love Quote I inserted there...




...spoke to me a little differently today.

Hear me out, alright?


You know... The more I think about it, the more I'm certain that love is something you shouldn't have to pine for. It should already be there. Given. And given freely. Without expectation of any returns. Given honourably. Without murmur or gripe. It comes without price tags, checklists or quota markers. And that's the beauty of it. It's so precious... yet it is given without cost. It is priceless... yet price-less.


When two people are in love, they don't seek to receive. All they want is to give. And they give willingly and sacrificially without resentment. Because that's what love is – unselfish. And that's what love does – give. It gives much and expects little. Because its pleasure is derived from its giving of happiness to the receiving party.


Passion • Devotion • Care • Affection • Adoration

Each one more outward-looking than the one before.


And that's the very nature of love. It looks outwards towards the happiness of the person the love is showered upon. Not inwards towards what you are supposed to receive. Because in love, there is no 'supposed'. You don't keep count. And not because you don't care... but because it doesn't matter.


I was once on the receiving end of, "What's mine, is yours." And I once said, "When you're happy, I'm happy." And to me, that's what love should be like. Because when you give love, you're giving from one pocket into another. And when you succeed in making the person you love the happiest person on Earth, you're happy. It's as simple as that.

21 comments :

choco said...

''Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it’s what you are expected to give — which is everything.''

I found this just as I was browsing through some quotes today, as I do everyday haha. And then I came across what you wrote.

And I couldn't agree more with you. :))

Unknown said...

Normally u write crappy stuff, but this post, juz hit all the right spots.
Like this,

When two people are in love, they don't seek to receive. All they want is to give. And they give willingly and sacrificially without resentment. Because that's what love is – unselfish. And that's what love does – give. It gives much and expects little. Because its pleasure is derived from its giving of happiness to the receiving party.



Erm, and oh yea, SECOND!

Pam Song said...

ATTN: choco
– Wow. I think that that quote is just so... accurate. I love reading quotes, too. They make me see things more clearly. =)

Pam Song said...

ATTN: Chris
"Normally u write crappy stuff, but this post, juz hit all the right spots.

-_-

Is that a compliment or what? But thanks... I think. At least this post hit home for you.

Unknown said...

Its juz a test of resolve...,

whether u want to see it as a complement, and say YES! I'll keep it up.

or

say Screw U!

I'll leave it back to u, u know which to choose. Open n subjective. Ermm, me comments are like that sometimes, two views in one, which one u wanna take, like in the Quick Change Artist. subtle, subtle.

Anonymous said...

"And when you succeed in making the person you love the happiest person on Earth, you're happy."

You hit the right spot Tinki! You ROCK! =)

Pam Song said...

ATTN: Chris
– Heh. I'm not playing along with your mind games. =p


ATTN: Adrian Lim
– Thank you. =)

zecount said...

well ... if more ppl realized this concept or principal ... the world would b a better place ... just look at the world today ...too many selfish ppl around ...no need to look far ..look at our Malaysian roads ..how many lah kiasu ppl on the road?

Pam Song said...

ATTN: zecount
– It's one thing to realise this concept and another to practice it. This kind of love is selfless. And to be honest, I think that selfless love is somewhat scary. Because you give and give and give without ever knowing if your giving will bear fruit. What if it falls on rocky ground? Or on the ground with weeds? If you're in love, you shouldn't care. But not caring about that isn't always easy.

R.A.L said...

well said.... that is love at its very best form....

to give without expecting anything in return....

and to get it when you least expected...

so pure and untainted ;)

Pam Song said...

ATTN: roy f.r.
– Thank you. And yes. You're right. That is love in its best, purest and most untainted form.

And the part about not expecting when you get is awesome, too. Cos when you don't expect, whatever you get becomes a pleasant surprise.

zecount said...

well ... that's why u have to pick a good soil u wanna sow in but i somehow disagree that when u are in love u shouldn't care ... i think u would care LESS ... in a sense it is like a barter system .. u give, I take and vice versa and needs are satisfied how that is done ...well, that's the beauty (and agony i think) in a relationship

Unknown said...

But u oredi did when u read the comment, heh! Too late.

Pam Song said...

ATTN: zecount
– Yeah, ideally it's like that lah. But how'd you know if it's good soil or not till you start sowing? Not that simple leh.

And point taken about "caring less". But then... we all SAY that we're caring less. But we don't. We still care. That's the very nature of men.


ATTN: Chris
– NEVAAA!!!

zecount said...

that's sumthing i beg to differ ...what is ur definition of sowing first???
in my opinion b4 sowing have to do lah some prelim test ...observation .. dun lah awal-awal dah head over heels and jump into it already ...like that of course lah not thinking properly .. any fault also like nothing through "rosy eyes"
Also we still care because we can never find perfect security in men nor will we ever ... but i dun think it's immpossible ..it's a choice we have to make ...definately a hard and difficult one ...in my previous comment i was gonna say that it is impossible for men to achieve self-less love but i think this is wrong i'll sent u an email and u judge for urself ... i think we can all do it ..but it takes real hard effort

zecount said...

oh and one more thing

it is easy to make a decision, it's either "yes" or "no" but are we ready to face the consequence after the decision or willing to do our due diligence b4 making the decision

my pennies worth :)

Pam Song said...

ATTN: zecount
– Well, naturally you have prelim tests lah. But... a lot you cannot really judge until you're committed in a relationship ma. To be fair, you can't expect the girl to go out on a limb to show you all she's like in a relationship until you're dating. And... you also won't ma. Right?

I read the email. And yes. Self-less love exists. But did you also notice that there was no romantic love examples?

"it is easy to make a decision, it's either "yes" or "no" but are we ready to face the consequence after the decision or willing to do our due diligence b4 making the decision"

This is true. It's like how it's easier to FALL in love than to STAY in love.

zecount said...

well that's the whole point rite? you won't know everything in the prelims ...u don't expect to know anybody thru and thru even after marriage (even more so for ladies) ..what more lah prelims ???
and what was the point u are arguing ?? cos all i see is that u wanna know someone thru and thru b4 sowing ..that's never gonna happen .. like investment also mah .. u do research on the stock, see how it performs and if it satisfy all ur prelims ..invest.. but still u won't know if it's a good investment until u put in the money and see the returns rite??

yea i know but my point is this ..if a parent or even a stranger can show that kind of self-less love to a child .. why can't lovers do it?? the relstionship between lovers is closer, more intimate and longer time spent together ... to me it all goes down to choice

oh and the email..teared up a bit when i first read it .. and still the heart is moved when i read it again ... it's just so .. lost for words... there's still hope for humanity

Pam Song said...

ATTN: zecount
– My point is that you said I need to look for good soil. How do I know who's good soil!?

And yes. There's still hope for humanity. =)

zecount said...

and i tot i already made that point ...somehow it was lost somewhere hahaha

Pam Song said...

ATTN: zecount
– No no, you never. Dun bluffff!!!

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