Thursday, June 07, 2007

Beh Tahan

Just. Too. Much. Work.


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I just realised that I've not taken a day off since I started working. Heck, I'm not sure if I am even allowed to have off-days pre-confirmation. Haha. Never asked; only assumed. Think sure can la hor?


But honestly, I never thought of taking a break yet either. YET. Haha. Guess that says a lot about what I do and how I feel about doing what I do. Yay for me! Anyway, I'm sure the day will come. Especially after this crazy fortnight.


*wipes brow*


I feel that the time to apply for a day off is drawing nearer. I feel it in my bones (and in my very tired brain). A full day off just to give me some Me Time. I kinda miss that. I kinda miss ME.


I miss waking up whenever my body tells me to. I miss my long, hot, morning baths. I miss doing nothing all day. I miss not having to leave the house even for meals. I miss leaving my hair to air dry before I shutdown for the day. Darn it, the more I talk about it, the more I realise that I miss all that and more!


Sigh.

And I sure miss posting on Tinki Talks.


I feel like I've been neglecting my blog. And it sure doesn't make me feel good. Tinki Talks has been like a friend to me. A companion. A confidante, if not more. My very own trusty sidekick. It's been subject to my greatest joys, worst rages, and deepest sadness. It's seen me through my ups and downs. It's been there with me through it all.


Never has it let me down. Never.
Never have I felt unloved. Never.


In fact, Tinki Talks is somewhat like my very own personal psychologist (in a self-help kinda way). It has, on more than one occasion, helped me process my thoughts and clear my mind when the world around me spins out of control. Sigh. Of late, I've realised that my thoughts no longer revolve around me. They revolve around whatever it is that I need to get done. Even when I go to bed at night, they haunt me. Sigh. I want time to think and ponder about the kinda stuff I always left myself to simmer in – life, love and relationship. It's been awhile. I want to think of those things.


*blink blink*

And then write some.

Sigh.


You know what, guys. Knowing me, I'd stay up to add to the list above just cos I miss Tinki Talks and all that. But right now, I'm kinda missin' sleep, too. I'm torn. But a choice has to be made.


Sigh.

I. Need. More. Time.

Goodnight, y'all. Zzz.

5 comments :

Sakura said...

hhmm.. i thought u told me to give myself sometime?? i mean.. at least at have time to blog.. btw.. u haven actually told me what u do.. :P
hey i kinda have that feeling of, being addicted to the blog i used to write too.. but after being busy with work and non extra time for myself then its all kinda come to and end.. until recently.. since i'd to stare on the pc screen most time, i have time to write crap..
anyway.. i do understand ur feeling.. i really do... seriously.. but u seems happy doing what u do for life.. i say.. nothing is perfect though.. we can't have all the time and fun or anything we wanted to... :P

Pam Song said...

Haha. I write. For a living. That's what I do. Haha.

And nah, I'm not addicted to blogging. It's just that it's on Tinki Talks that I put the things I wanna remember and the things I want to forget. Haha. Weird huh? It's like this. When I have things I wanna remember, I write it down here so that I don't forget. So that I can come back and read next time. Look back and laugh a second time.

But at the same time, it's here that I express myself. I write my thoughts. I write about what's bothering me. I write about things that ruin my day, things that piss me off, and things that hurt me. It's not about whether my readers understand. It's just about me letting it out somewhere. That's why I write. It helps me forget. Cos I've let it all out.

And I also write things that interest me. Things I see that I feel is funny. Haha. Or things that others do towards me. Just for kicks. So that I remember. Cos I know that these small things are never impactful enough for me to remember for always if I didn't have a blog. Now, at least when I look back next time, I'd have left myself a trail of small reminders of how people touched my life in small ways. =)

And yeah, I'd say I'm happy doing what I do. I'm very happy actually. Haha. It's tiring and all but it's fulfilling, too. It's just that work's been really heavy lately. It's crazy.

Sakura said...

eermm.. still.. what do u do??? asked so many times dee.. ???
ok now i know.. but to blog is actually eventually to remember things the way we could not in a way.. wat i mean is that.. to me it works as a diary.. just not that very personal kinda diary where u wrote all ur secret.. diary about daily life and wat i been through and whom i came across with..

ming said...

Beh tahan...I miss you ar char-boh!

=_="

miss you.
miss you.
miss you.

xiang2 ni3 la!

Pam Song said...

ATTN: christy
– Haha. Ok ok. I'm a Copywriter.

Well, I guess different people blog for different reasons. Sometimes, I go through blogs that are totally a diary of what people do throughout the day. That becomes really boring. Cos if you dunno the person, you really wouldn't give a rat's ass about what they had for dinner or who they went for supper with. Right?

But whatever floats their boat, I guess.


ATTN: ming
– I miss you, too, babe! When you coming back to see me? Sniff.

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