What's Love And What's GREAT Love?

I've been meaning to write about this for awhile now. But as always, I shamelessly procrastinate. A couple of lines I jotted down during a moment of emo-inspiration have been lying dormant and I think it's about time they see the light of day.


"I've learned over time that one cannot love another and protect oneself at the same time. Love doesn't work that way. You've gotta give it your all – your everything – FIRST... and then wait to see what happens thereafter."

I thought I was already being smart when I came up with that.

Yeah, I thought that, alright. Until I got hit with this today.

Pay attention. Cos it sure made me go 'wow'.

If you've chosen to love someone who readily loves you in return, good for you. Really. But that's it. That's where the story ends. It's good for you... but there's nothing great to it. It's easy to love someone who loves you back. Don't you think? Easier, at least.


But if you choose to love someone regardless of the outcome, well, that's GREAT Love. Why? Because it is when the outcome is unknown, that you are consciously taking a risk to love. When you say 'I love you' without knowing if you'll ever get a reply, you put yourself up on the table to get hurt. You open yourself up to the possibility of getting rejected. You leave yourself vulnerable to the person you say those three words to. Sounds scary as all hell, doesn't it?

But is that a bad thing?

Well, if your purpose is to protect yourself, first... and love, second, then... Yeah. It's a bad thing. But if to love is your greatest desire and intention, then what's so bad about giving that love even if it isn't returned in the way you hope it would be? Technically, you should already be happy for being able to give love even if you don't find yourself receiving any in return.


Don't get me wrong, though. I'm not saying that it's okay to be silly enough to continue to love a person who doesn't give two-hoots about you. It's not. It's only natural – human, even – to want to find someone who can reciprocate the love you offer with (at least) the same level of love or (better yet) more. But that doesn't happen as often as we'd like, does it?

Nope, I don't think it does.

If it did, we wouldn't have as many
Dear Thelma columns as we do today.

So, I guess the greatest thing about Great Love is that you never offer it with an expectant heart. All you want to do is give, and give, and give some more. That's where the joy of loving comes in for Great Love givers. Anything they do get anything in return, they consider bonuses. That makes sense, right? Because when you don't expect, you never get disappointed when you fail to receive. But should there ever come a time when you DO find yourself on the receiving end, it's zippedy-doo-dah-hello-sweet-bonuses all the way for you.


But offering Great Love isn't as easy as it sounds. It's wonderful in theory, of course. Most things are. They sound good. Probably because they're more often than not, seemingly self-righteous babble. Honestly, who can say that they'd offer everything they've got within them with hopes of NOTHING in return? Not many, I can tell you that.

It's when talk successfully becomes action,
that I'll stand and offer my salute in total respect.

I just pray that those with the courage to give Great Love do eventually get rewarded with everything their heart so desires. That they'll receive love in return someday. The kind of love that flies them to the moon and back again. Love that pushes the stars out from behind the clouds. The kind that prolongs the sunrises and sunsets that grace their days. And love that makes the flowers bloom in the Winter. After all, who deserves it more than they do?

Sigh.

Put it this way... Love just isn't always easy.

But I've discovered this: When love does come along and you find yourself willing to give it your all, it, in turn, becomes worth it all.