I Have Two Feet That Dance At Weddings

I've got two weddings to attend over the weekend.

Sounds like fun, right? Wrong. Why? Cos it ain't fun anymore when you have to choose which wedding to attend. Sigh. This feels like kindergarten all over again. I'm back in the middle of the field deciding who I want as my three-legged-race partner. Either way, I can only tie my foot to ONE other foot. I have two feet. Why can't I have two partners? "Nooooo," they say as they ridiculously stretch that blasted vowel. I have to make a choice. But damn it, I hate to choose! Because when you choose...

You're bound to offend the person you don't choose.

Sure, it's a friendship 'Sin of Omission', but a SIN to the offend-ee all the same. And let's be as real as real can be here. When it comes to emotional betrayal (wah, so drama), you're more likely to offend the person whose wedding you decided to forgo... than to make the day of the person you chose to share their special day with. Right?! Right!? Don't you think? It's a lose-lose situation, damn it!

I say it again. I hate to have to choose.
Because to somebody, I'll turn out to be the bad guy.
I'll end up being branded The Lousy Friend.

Sigh.

You know, they should really make it illegal for couples
to get married on the same day as any other couple.

I love weddings. But having to choose which one to attend totally ruins the pre-wedding buzz for me. I don't get to waste precious time or squeeze every ounce of brain juice on which shoe to match my hair or which earrings to match my eyes. Instead, I'm cracking my head in an effort to make a decision that will cause the least damage on the friendship scale.

Lists are supposed to help me organise my life.
...or so they say. So here goes.

My Dilemma:

Going through the list you've prepared
is what makes the list useful. Making one isn't.

Hmmm. Both are weddings. That means that the day means as much to one couple as the other. So it really brings me back to square one. Okay. This list is off to a bad start.

One's in KL and the other's in Penang.
It doesn't help that both locations are almost 400km apart.

Why are BOTH weddings in the morning and what's up with the wedding luncheon thingy? Aren't wedding dinners 'in' anymore!? I can't possibly be that outdated when it comes to the wedding scene, can I?!

*blink blink*

I need to attend more weddings. People, what the heck are you waiting for?! It's time to start dating and getting married, okayyy. You're not gettin' any younger. Guys, THE HUNT IS ON. It's the dawn of a new Hunting Season! I declare it. And if you've already got your fawn in the bag, it's time to take a good bite. Propose, damn it! I'll be expecting your invitations. The countdown begins.

Sigh. So difficult. One's a friend; one's an extended family member. Ooo, tough one. Family comes first, right? It's my bloody obligation (pun intended... *grin* ...I just couldn't resist). So I've gotta be there. But aren't friends the family you choose for yourself? So then how? Family of choice, or family by birth now? Sigh.

Well, I made my choice. But I feel like crap.

Sigh. Why can't I just be at two places at once?

Omnipresence would be a damn cool gift to have right now.