Musical Chairs, Anyone?

With how speedy things have gotten with dating nowadays, it's really no surprise that more and more people end up walking down the aisle with a mile-long laundry list of exes. Personally, I think the problem lies in the mindset where we begin to think that it's okay to 'just try' and 'see how' instead of knowing enough before loving.


You see, I've got friends who are, to my understanding, serial daters. They date and toss (or get tossed? – I'm not sure) like it's the most normal and natural thing to do. (I had a classmate who had 26 ex-boyfriends when we were 16!!) Well, with people like that, it sometimes surprises me that they never have to go through suitor reruns. Haha. Having said that, I recently discovered that some friends of mine have begun dating their close friends' exes.

Ahhh, so that's how the rerun system works.

You don't date people you've dated before...
no, you date people your friends have dated before!

(Whatever happened to the infamous
you-never-date-your-buddy's-ex rule?!
It's been abolished and I didn't know??)

Smart.

But it could definitely get messy.

Especially when you're fishing dating
in a small pool like... urm, Penang.

And unlike before when dating was the serious first step toward a lifetime together... now, it looks like what's deemed a 'serious relationship' is that which is met with a proposal and promised with a ring – diamond or no diamond, it matters not.

Bottom line:
The engagement seals the deal.

It tells the world,
"Hey, we're really together."

The most amazing part is that the people from that school of thought actually believe that everybody else who's in a relationship but isn't yet engaged, are but puppy love kiddos fooling around in the dating playpen! Sad but true. But that's exactly what's wrong with the dating world these days. People my generation are taking the whole dating-engaged-married thing so lightly!


When I was growing up, a proposal was a solid commitment toward marriage. It wasn't a competition to see who gets the most oohs and ahhs from having received/given the biggest rock or the most romantic proposal. It wasn't a performance played out for the rest of the world to watch. It was simply an outward expression of an inward emotion. All it said was this:

"I want to spend the rest my life with you.
And if you feel the same way about me, let's start
planning for that future together from this day forth."

And back then, once a proposal was accepted, that was it – no more backing out. (Unless really really last minute you realise tak jadi lah. And then you pay the price of getting frowned at and gossiped about. Harhar.)


But today, the rules have changed somewhat. People call off engagements all the time! It's as though the proposal and its acceptance was just another way to say, "I love you... for now." But that really shouldn't be the case, should it? So... what? Only marriage marks the serious first step of a committed relationship now?? Hell, that's baaaaddd...

*blink blink*

Wait a minute. I've digressed. Whoops.

Better get back to the topic at hand:
The dating rerun system.

Well, as happening as it sounds to have one boyfriend today and another the next (no wonder people always say, "Like changing clothes liddat," – heh), to be honest with you, I just can't reconcile myself with the fact, much less that kind of lifestyle. I don't know about you but it just sounds a lot like relationship musical chairs to me – under-aged almost-adults swapping love seats like there's carnival music playing and pausing in the background. And those people... They don't know what love is.