Two-timing. Adultery. Cheating. Having flings. Infidelity. Disloyalty. Unfaithfulness. Extramarital affairs. Fooling around.
Same diff to me lah, you know?
Whatever you wanna call it,
it sounds like the same old shit to me.
Whatever you wanna call it,
it sounds like the same old shit to me.
And it's the biggest sin
in my books. By. Far.
Here's why.
1. You break God's heart when you disobey his commandments. This is breaking commandment #7.
2. Not only do you break God's heart, you also break the heart of the person you claim to love. And if you didn't know, broken hearts don't heal easily. And even if by some miraculous intervention they do heal, the scars you leave remain long after.
3. You disappoint your parents. Did they really raise a person of such poor character? Their lifetime investment in you along with everything they've ever tried to teach you, goes down the drain with this one act of foolishness. You just wasted all their time and effort.
4. Which leads me to my next point. You successfully prove to the world you're a person of VERY POOR CHARACTER.
5. You shame and humiliate your family and all its members with your wrong and foolish behaviour. You're singlehandedly dragging their good name and reputation through the mud with you.
6. Oh, and while we're at it, let's throw Lying into the equation. You break your promise of love. And if you're legally bound to your partner, you're breaking the vows you exchanged before man and God. You're nowhere near being a person of your word.
7. You're a weak person and you don't know what you want. If you love a person, you love them AND ONLY THEM. How can you say you love them if you've got someone on the side?! You either step on one boat or the other. NOT BOTH. Never both at the same time.
8. You're unbelievably narcissistic, selfish and self-centered. You think of nobody but yourself. Not the person you're cheating on your partner with (curse the both of you to a lifetime of super kau BO, man), and definitely not the person you're dating / married to.
9. You have very bad manners. Even if you find yourself getting attracted to another, can you not even be courteous enough to break-up with the person you're with BEFORE you jump aboard another lousy, ciplak sampan???
10. You're a person without a conscience. Have you no inner guide to what's right and what's wrong? Do you feel no guilt for your misbehaviour?? What happened to morals, standards, values and principles??? Have you really none of those!?
Those who live such lives deserve to have their bodies stabbed a hundred times with rusty nails, their digits chewed off by rabid dogs, their eyes pecked out by crows, and then have their genitals SAWED off and fed to hyenas.
And no, there's no loophole for you cheats out there. Flirting, sneaking in a smile or two, shy glances, secret messages and any form of emotional attachment towards another other than your better half (yes, they're a gazillion times better than you are if you're a cheat) IS STILL CHEATING. It's called Emotional Cheating, you slimeball. *stab stab stab*
82 comments :
lol why suddenly so serious LOL
"But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."
Matthew 5:28
Guess it is better to lose one part of our body than for it to entirely be thrown into hell?
-------------------------------
Same diff. Same diff. Biggest sin in mine too. =)
I disagree with this post in the strongest terms possible.
Humans, like MOST mammals, are designed by God to be polygamic. We are built to procreate with multiple partners.
To defy this nature would be akin to defying the very core fundamental building blocks of life, as we know it.
Besides, there's something call free will and the freedom of choice.
Interesting Blog about this
ATTN: David Cheong
– Because cheating on the one you're with is not funny. A broken heart is not funny. Ruining someone's life is not funny.
ATTN: Nigelais
– You said it with Matthew 5:28. I hate the way ppl think that you need to get physical or have the official gf/bf title to constitute as cheating. So much as harbouring feelings for another or having lust for another is already cheating.
ATTN: Leon
– Hah. It figures. It's no surprise that this is coming from you. (I read your comment before I read your name.) Wouldn't expect anybody else to be such a jerk about all this. *snort*
And since you're getting married this year, I'd like to say that I hope your woman knows what she's getting into.
Free will and the freedom of choice? Go ahead. Find somebody else. But leave the one you're with BEFORE you decide to go hunting. A human would at the very least have a heart. People who do this? They're no better than vultures.
In that case Leon, I disagree with you.
I am not about to start any full fledge war here but I found your answer a tad bit chauvinistic.
It is a rather expected answer from a male, a patriarchal one.
If you can find me a proper scripture in the verse, that said God allowed polygamy and to be with multiple partners, I’ll hold back my opinions.
And another thing, it’s odd that you actually compare humans with animals, despite us being so close to the species of mammals.
But still, an animal is an animal, a human is a human.
I agree with freedom of choice,
But to cheat on your partner thinking it is freedom of choice, its bullshit in my books.
Call me bias, but these are my very mere two cents
But freedom of choice has in no way related to CHEATING ON YOUR partner
It is out of topic if you asked me.
You want freedom of choice, you get it.
Have a clean break and do it openly.
Don’t do it behind someone’s back that indicates the person being anything but dirt low.
-kellster
ATTN: kellster
– You said it lah! BULLSHIT.
Leon: Haha...you wanna cari pasal with the queen that kicks butt in flowy skirt...Show time!=P *enjoying popcorns with coke light*
Pam: Adultery is an abomination in the eyes of the Lord! Wedding bed shall not be devoured cos God honours marriage....a COVENANT that cannot be broken =)
ATTN: Adrian Lim
– Leon's being the jerk he always is.
And yes. Adultery is a pathetic attempt humans make to find MORE love. Pure rubbish if you ask me. If things are not working out, you walk away. CLEAN BREAK-UP. And if you still wanna make it work, fill your love tank with God's love.
Leon, I cannot agree with what you said.
God did not create man to be Polygamic.
Please back up your statement with a believable reference.
If your claims of polygamy is right, then not only a man can have many wives, that would also mean the wife can have many husbands, am i not wrong?
So does that mean you will share your wife with other husbands?
Genesis 2:24
That's why a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife. The two of them will become one.
Notice that it is singular man and wife.
Not more than one wife eh...
Leon, you Muslim ka???
Do you know what is FREE WILL?
It is not to do what you like...
But rather to do what is RIGHT...
For example - you do not have free will to murder, as you will be send to the courts and sent to jail..
So, there is no free will to murder.
And as you know the courts adopted law from the teachings of religion (or with religious influences)
And since God said - do not commit adultery in Exodus 20:14.
and also in -
http://www.biblegateway.com/quicksearch/?quicksearch=do+not+commit+adultery&x=0&y=0
Therefore, since with these notes that murder and adultery is on par not acceptable by God, would you now retract your statement that God created man to be polygamic?
ATTN: Randy Khoo
– Goooooo, RANDY! That was a man of no morals speaking. I also want to see him take it back. Heh.
I totally disagree with leon as well for the same reason that you guys have mentioned above.
Great post pamsong! :]
When I heard what was happened. I feel as hell of a fiery fire to burn the devil out too (you know who).
It gets me even upsad by reading this Leon's silly comment on freedom of choice. You're telling me you're free to CHEAT!!?? Another one. Classic.
These are the ppl who turn the world into a mess. They don't know they're talking about bullshit.
Hahahahaha.....the pan is really HOT liao....*me getting 2nd pop corn to enjoy*
wah! even reader with 'the pinkbanana' name come out liao....Wkakaka! Got rainbowcolor banana boh?! Mwahahahaha =)))))
ATTN: thepinkbanana
– Haha. Thanks. Glad you like it. Got pretty pissed writing it. Haha.
ATTN: JYJL
– ME, TOO!!! ANGRY LIKE HELL, OKAYYY. ARGH! So insensitive and ungentlemanly to cheat. Never figured the people I know to fall into this category. Sigh.
And yes. Leon's comment wasn't tasteful. In fact, I'm gonna brush it off cos it's not worth my time. He's always been one to take the opposition's side. Anyways, it's clear that his point is waaaay outnumbered here.
ATTN: Adrian Lim
– Yeah. Everybody's touchy about this subject.
oppps i'm so dead lor since i said i love you before?? +_+
hahaha
nyway right this is very true but on the other hand people around is ignoring it and take it as if its normal to do so....sad case
ATTN: joshuaongys
– Yes, I thought it was inappropriate. Too many ppl take these things too lightly now.
lolx... i actually do say it often.. to quite many ppl.. but they know wat i mean lar... as in they are close frens to me and i love them as my fren =) haha
ATTN: joshuaongys
– Kasihan your gf lah.
love is sacred. and a broken heart never really heals.
i agree with you 100%. those sins destroy families!
If just mistake is what it takes to be condemned to hell, then why not put themselves in a situation whereby there are no chance for this kind of sins to come by?
I guess if someone took this seriously, (like really think about all this kind of sins before getting into a relationship)... They'll either be single for the rest of their life or be stuck with one person for the whole of their life.
CLAP CLAP CLAP! I totally agree!
ATTN: sheon
– If only there was less talk about it and more realisation.
ATTN: zhengdhong
– Yeah. It's not just you and your partner or you and the one you're cheating on your partner with. The whole family unit crumbles.
ATTN: 3POINT8
– I agree. People shouldn't put themselves in such positions in the first place. Play with fire, you're bound to get burned in the end.
But... where I disagree is when you said, "I guess if someone took this seriously, (like really think about all this kind of sins before getting into a relationship)... They'll either be single for the rest of their life or be stuck with one person for the whole of their life."
Not necessarily wat. I know a lot of ppl who change bf and gf like they change clothes but THEY NEVER CHEAT ON THEIR PARTNERS. Whenever they feel like it's going the wrong way or when they feel like they're no longer as smitten by the ones they call their own, they check themselves and walk away if they know it's really heading nowhere. That's having decisiveness. And being responsible to the one who's placed their hearts in your hands.
ATTN: SarahMeiAnn
– Wheee! =)
sex and emotional attachment is an addiction and like all addiction, they affect the loved ones the most. Addicts are the best liars, their brain is wired to lie so they can continue their addiction.
Their addiction is not right but at the same time people should realize they can't help themselves. They need support to break out of their habit.
Its easy to fall into hate, hard to crawl out with forgiveness and humility. Love is your salvation.
haven't seen this blog so Christian since... forever...
Why does it only take tragedy to bring God up?
Kudos anyway!!!
God bless!
Everyone is throwing in the quote from the Bible. I don't read the Bible.
Let's all just love PamSong. Pam I love you :p
*claps claps*
I'm with you on this one! Cheating bastards are wayyyyyyy low........ they don't deserve my respect.
WHOA WHOA WHOA hahahha too much angst in this post pam song. I is feeling you! Tis what we call Assholism.
i agree with the post completely... but disagree with the fact that everyone thinks polygamy is wrong according to the bible... it's not.
the mormons practice it, and they follow the teachings of the bible.
i don't really like referencing the bible, because it can be intepreted differently by different people...
but
Exo 21:10
"If he takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, or her marital rights."
Deuteronomy 21:15
"If a man has two wives, the one loved and the other disliked, and they have borne him children, both the loved and the disliked, and if the first-born son is hers that is disliked,"
this comment in no way shows i support polygamy... just that i wanted to show that polygamy is accepted in the bible therefore cannot be used as an argument.
Andrew, isnt that in the old testament? Pam, can you elaborate how the old testament differs from the new to the readers of your blog please. Like that means we still have to sacrifice live offerings to God on an altar everytime we sin lah.
Simon..yeah...i love pam too.
That is exactly the reason why i am confused in matters of religion.. how can there be so many interpretations from a single Holy Book.
i'm still sticking to Moral as my religion.
kasihan?? hmmmm well... i duno how to say it but.. nvm haha
well, i don't think we have to have live offerings... i think Jesus had a new law to overwrite the old testament... probably ask us to go for confession or something...
He did say however: "Think not that I have come to abolish the law and the prophets; I have come not to abolish them but to fulfil them. For truly, I say to you, till heaven and earth pass away, not an iota, not a dot, will pass from the law until all is accomplished."
Matthew 5:17-18 by the way.
so that means if He didn't pass a new law, the old laws stand... and He didn't pass one on polygamy... He just left it.
anyway, someone commented earlier and asked for a "proper scripture in the verse, that said God allowed polygamy and to be with multiple partners"... that's all i'm providing.
Andrew:
Firstly, mormons are not accepted as an authentic denomination in the christian circle. They are considered as a cult. Furthermore, they view the book of Moronism (i think from the angel moroni) above the bible.
Hence, they do not accept the biblical teachings as outlined by Christ.
If you look at Matthew 19:
Jesus outlined a few things
1. v4 - God made humans male and female (no homosexuality)
2. v5 - two will become one flesh (notice that Jesus does not accept a third party)
3. v6 let not man separate (it's suppose to LAST together)
4. v8 - God permitted divorce because the peoples' heart were hard.
You should not take it only by the verses, but by the overall message of the bible.
When Jesus came and said he was the fulfillment of the law, it clearly shows about him offering himself as a sacrifice of our sins.
You can say that God TOLERATED man's polygamic ways in the old testament - just as how God tolerated man's divorce - because our hearts are hard. Matthew 19:8
Jesus also says -
anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another women, commits adultery.
So, NO!!! No adultery, no divorce, no polygamy...
Only way for you to get out of your marriage is to divorce...
(and that, with good grounds for one..)
Sometimes, if we have problems with our other halfs (that they cannot stop being unfaithful) we should have stopped the whole things from the start - and not marry (matthew 19:9)
Andrew, the fact that you quoted those verses shows that God knows in polygamic lifestyle, there is bound to be unfairness and exploitation.
Your verses DOES NOT MEAN that God accepts poligamy.
In the same way, when God said that the King should not have multiple wives in Deuteronomy 17:16-17. However, Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines.
Yet, God did not chastise the King for his actions..
Another EXAMPLE of God's grace..
That God is tolerating our poligamic ways does not mean he accepts them.
AND NO!!! we shall not continue sinning so that grace may abound (Romans 6:1-2)
to Estherlauderlyn,
If you look at Hebrews 10:1-4
You will realise that the blood of animals is only an annual reminder to the jews, AND IS NOT possible to take away sins.
But in verses 5-7, it explains Jesus as the sacrifice that is written about that takes away the real sin.
and verse 14 of Hebrews 10 -
...one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy.
Vs - 18 and where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin.
So, no, Christ is the ONLY real sacrifice of sin.
We do not need to sacrifice animals anymore.
okay..i'm in no way saying i'm holy moly and all that. but i do believe in the Lord's commandments and try as i might to follow them.
and andrew, my 2 cents.
the scriptures u have quoted, do NOT clearly state that polygamy is acceptable. and u have to also take into context the period in which it was written. as my sister said, it was written in the old testament. the same time when daughters were saying that they should get their fathers drunk and lie with him. i'm going completely out on a limb here and say that it was all for populating purposes. (nothing to back me up, i'm just stipulating) and for that matter, how about the 7th commandment. if the Lord condoned polygamy, which in actual fact would mean for a man to 'cheat' on his first wife, cos really, which wife would willingly give up her husband to another woman? it'll always seem like cheating to her; why then, would He intone to Moses commandment no.7, which let me state for all to hear,
THOU SHALT NOT COMMIT ADULTERY. and if you want further proof that polygamy isn't condoned, please read 1 Corinthians chapter 7. a few verses that stood out,
But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.
1 Corinthians 7:2
noted singular WIFE. the chapter goes on to say about immorality and if one needs to fulfil desires, then they should MARRY. immorality here would (i'm guessing) be more of lust, adultery, etc. etc.
you also said the Mormons practice polygamy. did u also know that the Mormons also believed that God was a man who progressed to Godhood? and that no man can come to Christ except through his 'prophet' Joseph Smith? They also believed that Jesus had many wives. They say Mary and Martha were among his wives. One Mormon authority said Jesus was killed for his polygamy. and also God is having kids. Surrounded by what must be 1,000 or more wives, God is having little spirit babies which will inhabit the people born on the earth. The number of babies this requires Him to produce daily is incredible! No explanation is given why their God of flesh and bone, having babies through physical sexual contact with his wives, has only spirit babies. They teach that Mary married God to have Jesus (or else He would have been illegitimate) and then divorced him to marry Joseph. oh and this one...Mormon scripture consists of four books. They are: (1) The Book of Mormon (2) Doctrine and Covenants (3) Pearl of Great Price and (4) The Bible (in that order). The first three books seriously contradict the Bible. Mormons often ignore the Bible, claiming it is "mis-translated."
So do you still think the Mormons follow the teaching of the Bible, Andrew?
sorry pam for the overlong and draggy comment. you know i love you. muaks!
.... gee thanks Randy. Like a 5th genration Christian didnt know that already :p
attn randy..
urm...do u know the meaning of sarcasm?
if u don't. then...i'll be happy to say this. my sister...yeah...esther, was being sarcastic. duuh.
AWWWW sarcasm.... trying to be cute issit? hahahaha....
How would I know that you're a 5th gen? I just read your comments - like just a few hours ago, and YOU EXPECT me to know so much about you already?
Hey.. I'm not a stalker ok...
And BTW, nice to meet you two...
And you two do look very much alike.. (referring to the pic with baby alyssa on Grace's blogspot)
I'm first generation Christian actually. And an assistant teacher in my Church. So, if you guys or girls got anymore Christian questions, doctrinal questions, please shoot.
Cheers..
since when was sarcasm ever linked to being cute? sorry, I can TRY to be nice la.. but I dont do cute.
humility seems to be something that you have yet to learn, randy.
Whoa...
That's a hot temper you got there...
What happened to the spirit of gentleness and kindness?
I know.. if you two promise to be nice(or TRY to be nice - as how esther puts it), I'll let you buy me a drink the next time we meet... hahahaha...
i'm not even going to dignify that comment with an answer.
please go eat some humble pie or something.
wow...
And for a moment, I actually thought being a 5th generation Christian would mean something more than STATUS...
Coz the way you're responding right now, seems like you two are nothing more than any common girl i know.. And I've seen loads like you..
Prove me wrong and say something really nice next time ya...
Oh yeah, and I'm still up for drinks, that is if you're STILL gonna be nice.
[Hey I'm humble enough for drinks and to chill, You two humble enough to be nice?]
Chill people....... tinkitalks is all about loving and sharing and how pam has no life. :)
I support you Sheon. Love and sharing for no life Pam.
haha, i actually forgot to proof read my comment... i was suppose to delete the mormon statement, after i remembered a really funny south park episode about it...
anyway, randy, u are right, my verses did not mean that God accepts poligamy... i never said He did, i just said it was in the bible.
gee...randy. right now aren't you passing judgement and making conclusions about 2 girls that you don't know? and who, by the way are just responding to what YOU have said earlier on.
right now, you're being a bit full of yourself from the way you're saying that you're 'willing' to meet up for the drinks. don't you think you're presuming that we'll agree? right now, i don't think we'll ever see eye to eye.
and honestly speaking, i don't have to prove who i am to anyone. least of all to you. shame on you to think that we need to prove ourselves just because you think you're better than us by being an assistant teacher in church. which, by the way doesn't mean you should be promoting yourself by asking people to ask you about Christian doctrines. even pastors don't deem themselves knowledgeable enough to answer any question.
@_@
Whoa. Indeed, love brings out the best and the WORST in all of us. No time to go through and reply all of you one by one now. Will respond to you guys when I get home tonight lah ya.
Be good.
How does it make us better '5th Gen Christians' if we say, 'Like, oh okay! Lets! It would be AWESOMMMMMEEE to meet up with you, you're such a charmer Randy!'
So... that would make me the good Christian I should be? So now you're implying we dont have freedom of choice la since we're bound by OUR same belief.
Christian or not la Randy, (and yes Pam I'll say it like I mean it) call me rude, but I'd tell you to get a life. Don't go TRYING to pick up girls on a blog. Please dont do that, doesnt make you different from most of the scumbags I know. Go grow balls.
I'm standing in front of the stage waiting for Marie Digby to perform. Damn a lot of people here.
Leng Chai Randy & Pretty Lau(s):
Yaiks! Cool dowwn fellas! Chill out! Chill Out! Follow me.....*breath in, breath out slowly*.....mah boh su lor....Haha =)
This discussion about relationship has gone full out Christian theology conference. Anyway, I had a friend who three-timed a girl, and I seriously screw the shit out of him when I knew. I hate bastards like that (but well, he's still my friend, and to my knowledge, he didn't do it again).
I just disagree with one thing.
it IS possible to fall in love with more than one person at the same time - there is no stopper on feelings, right? emotional cheating, providing if the person do not act on it (flirt, shy glances and the other stuff u mentioned). You cannot blame someone for liking another. it can't be help. slimeball is too harsh.
but this is just my opinion -.-
oh, and hello, pam.
I'm gonna say it like I mean it. :)
I had to say something because I was a victim of this 'relationship sin' that you mentioned here. (long ago)
Yeah. It hurts really, really bad. It felt as if I did something wrong because I was rejected. It was hard at that time.
But in the end, I had to forgive in order for me to move on and be stronger.
As years passed, I'm glad it happened because I'm now happier than I was before, emotionally stronger than I was before and of course, closer to God than I was before. =)
wow.. interesting topic here.. me quite new to bloging, have been bored to death reading some of the blogs till I found this.. hehe..
well there are a few billion people on earth so we will probably have a few billion different answers with different religious backgrounds so probably your right maybe a wrong in another part of the world. But what I want to say is...when it comes to love relationships..I would follow my heart. Love is love it matters not what religion preaches. Ask yourself, you marry someone you thought you loved but then later realizes it was a mistake. I am sure you know, you can't force a love, it has to come from the heart. We are not perfect so we all have our bad habits, our secrets which only surfaced when we say "I do til death do us part" and then a few years down the road, you have children, now it gets complicated, we are talking about family now. BUT your heart or love is not there, you meet others and begin to compare, you begin to drift apart. Now, its sacrifice - family or love? but in actual fact there are 2 different entities. Loving your children and loving your wife doesn't come from the same "compartment" .. hey come on, you don't kiss your wife and kiss your daughter the same way... be frank... putting a square peg into a round hole, it just doesn't fit, you need to find a square hole, but then the complexity of divorce, the hurt and politics of in laws coming into the picture, its the last thing we want... therefore, the only choice and only reasonable thing to do is an "affair" with the one you truly love. You only live once. Say what you want, but look at the world of marriage nowadays, it more complicate then just love, there is more to life then just love feelings, we need food & clothings at the very least to survive and that complicate things further and you don't have to look far, just look around your neighborhood, you will find all this "sinners" as what you have implied.
It's not a sin to love someone you truly love... god knows that..I m sure. I know not all will see my point of view and a paragraph of reasoning is not enough to scrape the complexity of the oldest subject of mankind.. hehe...have a nice day everyone.. :)
Hey, I would wanna resolve this peacefully. And you two do really crack me up.. hahaha..
Firstly, It is Gracie's comments at 1.30 and 1.33 that's been inappropriate. Although she deleted the one at 1.30, it was still sent out to subscribers.
[Therefore, if you look back at the history, I'm not the first one to pull the trigger]:p
Secondly, how different is a mention being 'assistant teacher' anymore peacocking that a "5th generation Christian". By any standards, i consider it the same. And i'm not the first to mention this. And I meant it as an offer to help and enlighten - sorry you gals got the WRONG message. Just because I said I'm an assistant teacher, I DON'T claim omniscience.
If you two are not happy about anything, email me and flame me. Let's keep Pam's blog as Pam's.
[and to be fair, i did try to look for your emails on your respective blogs, but I couldn't find them - which i only resort to spam here - apologies to the rest of the readers who had to read this!]
My email is randy.khoo(at)gmail.com
that is, if you 2 are still keen on peace..
Fish Hunter, i love your comment :)
Randy, i haven't finish my popcorn :(
Keep it up Randy. It's starting to show the real you instead of the goodie-two-shoes you were trying to portray yourself as earlier on.
If ur a genuine Teacher of The Book, then I'm Virgin Mary. And we both know what are the odds of that.
You know, I really don't know where to start answering your comments. Haha.
pamsong: forget it. hahahahah
Quote:
"And no, there's no loophole for you cheats out there. Flirting, sneaking in a smile or two, shy glances, secret messages and any form of emotional attachment towards another other than your better half (yes, they're a gazillion times better than you are if you're a cheat) IS STILL CHEATING. It's called Emotional Cheating, you slimeball. *stab stab stab"
Gosh! the whole population of the world will be wiped out hehehe
mmm probably not, a few insane ones and retarded ones. I think it's abit too harsh.
God gave us all the power to choose, to make a choice, we need to make comparison, we need to analyse, we need to test, we need to experience so that we could find the perfect one, some maybe lucky, some may be to go thru' some pain,
and hey, girls need to flirt first to get close to boys to find out further, is that guy the right one? you need to cheat them boys to find out their secrets, you need to act, you need to lie, let me see.. how about, accidentally drop a hankerchief to test, how many gentelmen out there..hehe nope that's too old fashion, mmm probably pretend.. abit drunk at parties, knock on a few boys, see if they are scumb bags or slim balls or a gentlemen.
Come on what goes in your head a that time? you cheat, you flirt, you wink to prey your targets. Now that isn't really bad is it? is our tools of living, its our tools of hunting so that we can find a perfect couple.
Now tell me, when you go to party, why do we all dressed up for, even those married, why the low cuts, why the slit on the side of your skirts, why the see thru's, why mini skirts?.. they are all for one thing only, to attract attention, to make human brain crawl into this zone of "what ifs" and probably half the party boys will be striping you off in their minds. don't blame them, it's a part and parcel of the utilities given by god. Inorder for a "short" to exist, you must have some "tall" ones, therefore a slimball have to exist so that we can have a gentlemen but then where is the line? From your commandments above, you have lifted the line so high even a priest will find it hard to measure up to...
hehehe... have a nice day everyone.. it's just an opinion of mine.. :)
Fish Hunter...you know....you have a very good point there.
Fish Hunter, you rock :)
sheon: & sj: Thank you :)
pamsong:
Please don't get me wrong, its just some constructive argument for some reading, there is nothing wrong with your commandments, I know its all for goodness and perfect living values but such high moral values are hard to find, you are surely one lucky woman if you could find one :)
hey fish hunter ..just a differnece in opinion (that was bound to happen hhehe) anyways .. I disagree with the way u describe love .. especially when u said that it's ok when have an affair outside because u have falledn out of love with ur wife .. to me theo whole point of the affair is not about love ..it's about escaping the responsibilities of a husband
also marriage was never easy to begin with ... past, present and future ...the mechanisms or responsibilites may differ but it was never easy ..it's two lifes merging into one .. how is that suppose to be easy?
another things is that what is ur definition of love? and no dun say emotions cos everyone knows that ..
by what i read, ur portraying love as a physical entity .. "family and love" whereas love should encompass family
I would say there are different "shades" of love .. example would be the colour green .. it has one of the most variety of shades .. but it's still the colour green ... a love for a wife and children is different yet the same as well .. both u show care and protect yet the way that love is potrayed is diffrent.
I agree that God gave us the power to chose and i also agree that it's not a sin to truly love someone ..then why not make the right choice before marriage?
U said that secrets onli come out after marriage ..well if a couple cannot even share their most deepest secrets during courtship then why get married ?
and it's true also that we need to "see" how the person of interest is like .. i'm sure they are better ways to "test the water"
Hi zecount, you got some points there :)
difference in angle of view, yes it's bound to have...
especially when its from a women's view point, religious backgrounds & upbringings.
I know when I said "affair", hehe, I know it will trigger some moral & marriage values where society will definitely disagree hehe. but we can't shut our eyes to the facts that it is very widespread. An affair can only occur from both parties (man & woman), we can't just put the blame on men or as you said "responsiblity of the husband". Both parties(man & women) are as guilty.
About "why get marriage when you don't love her", this is complicated hehe, and there is no one answer to it, it all depends on individuals and many other reasons.
Have you heard about the proverb and sayings
Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.
On our honeymoon, he puts me on a pedestal (rock)
After the honeymoon, he puts me on a budget
before marriage, when I snore, it was cute, its music to my ears
after marriage, when I snore, it's pathetic, it's irritating
hehe, here are some of the jokes people make fun about marriages and we laugh because it does make some sense. You see alot of thing changes when we cross the line. The real "you" can only be seen after the "chains and cuffs" are intact, things changed because you are "tied up", we don't have to be so smooth in our speech anymore hehe, and the terror sets in, OOoh is that what I have jumped into hehe.
Now of course, it doesn't happen to everyone, some lucky ones could be the other way around, after marriage, their love blossoms further, they have found true love, every imperfection of his/hers makes us even to love him/her more. The perfect marriage as what soceity would view as the "right way"
From the looks of things, I guess alot have fallen in the former category, that's why we see so many divorces, so many affairs and so so many heartbreaks.
Regards to " different entities of love", yes, I do agree with you to a certain extend that it comes from the same compartment but probably in different shades. Now I do not wish to be viewed as a sex maniac hehe, but to most men, sex is every important and it occupies 3/4 of a man's brain literally" hehe, or else "vigra" won't be the best selling drug in the world, I know some men will not agree what I say hehe. It all boils down to opportunity, just put any married man together with a pretty lady and with the blessings of his wife, you go figrue out what happens. Men has one big compartment for sex which he thinks is love, its almost inseparable hehehe but then he has another compartment for love & responsibility for the family.
Ask yourself... let's say you said: "yes darling I love you with all my heart.. but darling no sex please..."
What do you think the men will say to this? bullshit! you call that love? hehehe
Men cannot distinguish sex n love, to them it's from the same compartment
now I am an old man already with grandchildren hehehe there is more to life then just sex alone but still it remains a big chunk and occupies a major portion of our brain hahahaha we just suppress it that's all.
I am just being frank, so that you all can learn something from it.hehehe
Sorry boys, I let out your secret...hehe
and girls, when you boyfriend says, "No, she is just a friend, we just watch the movie.. that's all" think twice before you agree to that hahahahaa
That's life lah... the residue effects of our god given instrument for the production line. :)
Quote:
I would say there are different "shades" of love .. example would be the colour green .. it has one of the most variety of shades .. but it's still the colour green ... a love for a wife and children is different yet the same as well .. both u show care and protect yet the way that love is potrayed is diffrent.
Unquote:
That is the whole culprit of misunderstanding between the sexes.
The definition of so call love...and blaming each other for who is right and wrong.
The love for a wife and children are definitely different but most women begs to differ.
Let's take a look at a court drama in a divorce case..
You can see clearly, while throwing all the curse at each other but when it comes to the children, both parties shows their love and care, some would even shed tears and feel sorry for the children in the middle of all this hurt and anger but when it comes to love for each other - it's back to "I hate you", I can't stand the sight of you, you scumbag ! you bitch!
What happen to the shades of green? or was it a different compartment all together?
Most men would take all the responsibility when it comes to the children out of love for them.
Most women will allow their "scumbag" ex-husband to see their children,all because for the love of their children.
The faster you all see the difference, the better you see in your choice for your life partner :) hehehe
Fish Hunter: Hey there! Sorry pal, I cant agree with you on some of your points.
Quote 1: "Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener"
It could be true to certain extend but it DOES NOT grant you a ticket for you to commit an affair!Marriage comes with COMMITMENTS & RESPONSIBILITIES. BTW, LOVE is NOT ONLY about having sex and pleasures but sharing your life with the one that you LOVE passionately!
Quote: "Men cannot distinguish sex n love, to them it's from the same compartment"
Not true! Who says that men could not distinguish that! Are you saying that we are too weak to even control our desires? That our brains are so volatile that the concept of 'Freedom of CHOICE' no longer holds? And it is so hard to be FAITHFUL to a woman that has ever captured your heart? And what does the marriage vows "I DO" means to you?!
Its all ties down to your believe and principles. I wouldnt want to spend the rest of my life with a partner that rates relationship so low and cheap! And to walk away from responsibilities is just so demeaning. I consider these people "LOWER THAN THE DUST!".
BTW, God gave you the 'instrument' to enjoy sex but does not say that you could commit adultery! Get your facts right! If you dont have a BIBLE, tell me your address, I'll send you one...BTW,no hard feelings...=))
Cheers, Adrian =)
Hello Adrian :))
Sorry, I am not a christian, if this topic is about christianity or religion, I would not have posted anything here because I am in no position to question people's beliefs. I respect everyone's choice of religion. If you were to read again carefully, I did not put any principle of my own for people to follow, I did not say adultery and affairs are the rightful choices, I m merely pointing to the facts that in some situations, people have to make a choice - if you read again about the "affair" thing I mentioned, I purposely put a point "an affair with the one you truly love" and I know no book of law in whatever religion will say "you can if...." it's either you follow or you break, that's what laws are make for - a guideline to what's "right" or "wrong" in that context
And about the "quotes" - come on, please lah..you know very well they are not my quotes, just to stress a point about human behaviors before marriage and after marriage, there is some truth in it that alot of people got married and started grumbling when they have to change their life style to married life.
About the sex thing in men, true or not, just look around you, you know why our government stop chinese maids into our country, no matter how cheap their services are? Yes, mistresses, and what do you think those men who have mistresses were thinking? love? Go to every city in the whole wide world, one blarring lucrative business is prostitution/SEX, what is the most lucrative internet business - Porn, what is one of the best selling drug other then asprin - Vigra
I am not saying they are right, I am not saying all this is RIGHT, NO!, I have children and grandchildren, I wouldn't want them in these kind of world at all, but we have to face the facts, if throwing the "books" at them could solve this problem, we would have achieved centuries ago. Adrain, you are one of the lucky ones :) but the majority of the population, its a sad statistic and I don't want to touch on a religion that permits and encourages 4 (but I m sure they have their own reasons). Doesn't this statistics tell you something, what's in the mind of men? Do you know in some countries, selling sex is part of their national revenue, the thrist of men's desire. yes it sounds filthy but it's sad reality.
If we don't nib the real source of the problem, we will never solve the problem, we just merely suppress them as best we could. I know nobody in their right mind would admit, "I am a sex maniac". did you know that in politics, these people know that "weakness of men" and takes advantage of them to smear their reputation? and it always WORKS ! YES its the taboo of human/religious principles and suddenly everyone looks down on them like dirt. Nobody wants to admit it, since when did the population of the world ever in a decreasing trend? wonder where all the babies came from.
Quote:
Its all ties down to your believe and principles. I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life with a partner that rates relationship so low and cheap! And to walk away from responsibilities is just so demeaning. I consider these people "LOWER THAN THE DUST!".
Unquote:
It's really "dusty" in this world of ours.
and Adrain, no worries, I have no hard feelings, and I like your postings :)) and I hope our world have more of kinds like you with such high principles :))
Cheers :)
Fish Hunter: Haha...sorryla if I quoted you wrongly....You got some interesting points though....=)
To be honest, my parents do not throw those "BOOKS" to me....its a matter of CHOICE and personal preference. And Yes! I will love to have SEX but ONLY with the one that I Love(wife)lol! By saying that doesnt make me a sex maniac.....see the difference?
I will say its not so much about what religion forbids you.....Nobody can stop us if we want to have free sex with anyone; especially men at our age. We are young, vibrant and capable. But is that the RIGHT thing to do by going around and indulge in sin? Statistic can be scary and sadistic but can those thing stop me from getting myself RIGHT with the woman that I love and RIGHT with God? I think you know the answer. It is the CORE VALUE in the person that matters.
Have a great weekend Fish Hunter...haha...I am still wondering why you picked up the name Fish Hunter (Pemburu Ikan)? =)
Quote:
Have a great weekend Fish Hunter...haha...I am still wondering why you picked up the name Fish Hunter (Pemburu Ikan)? =)
Unquote:
Literally, yes, I am a fish hunter :)
My job is to travel and hunt for source of fish and connect them with global fish traders for worldwide distribution. As for my case, my concentration is ASIA.
Hehe.. anyway, I think it's about time we move on to other topics.. I guess pamsong wants this issue closed hehehe...
Good day :))
hey fish hunter .. that was a nice discussion ... i guess after reading all this is that we all know what is wrong and right ... but actually putting it into action ... it is difficult but i still think it doens't give us the excuse to do it ...although the whole world is doing it
maybe think of it this way ... if everyone were to do the right thing ... then there wouldn't be any "slimeballs" ... easier said than done ... sumhow i think society nowadays focuses on all the wrong things to make a relationship go rite
what do u think?
Hi zecount
Yes, it's definitely was a nice discussion :) and I do agree with your remarks, it's true about society, they always focuses on all the wrong things.
Now let me take you to a higher ground to view down so that we can have a better picture of how society works and comes up with all this laws and regulations. I have been in some of this laws and regulation discussion for ASEAN though I am not an appointed committee but our discussion and points were crucial in some of the regulations because it involves our business.
Every regulations invented, we have to know the lower end and the higher end and it is normally based on a group or statistics of a few and not the whole.. It's quite impossible and not logical to analyse every individual and draw a line between the right and wrong.
Even when we make the law, we already know that there will be those at the edge of the drawn line of the law between right and wrong and there is bound to have conflicts and feelings of unfairness but for the sake of the whole, we need to sacrifice a few.
Now I have not been truthfull about my previous posts to set my argument, what I did was I took those who had to be sacrificed and ask you all to make the verdict..eg. "an affair with the one you truly love" - is an example of the few who had to be sacrificed but law is law, we can't simply change it to serve the few or the whole system of rule will collapse . Adrian was right when he kept to his principles and argued that it's wrong to have an affair - what Adrian did was he stepped into the line of "right" to make his argument :)
Now, let's move even higher up the mountain and view wider and further..:)
When a law is made and only benefits a few and wronged the majority, the line of right and wrong have to shift or it will all collapse. Now society according to the "books" is shifting
Now one example of a shift in law..pls take this open mindedly and as a discussion.
During the religious War between Christians and Islamic factions, alot of the islamic faction men and boys have died in the war...the impact of death was so so great that the population of men and women became a nightmare, there wasn't enough men to women and people began to have "affairs" or those unlucky "law abiding and rightful" women will die withering before blossoming for it was against the "law". They have no choice, no alternative but to shift the line of the law so that the majority right law abiding citizen could have a happy and full life.. so be it..each man can have 4 wives. the man were happy and the women were happy and it was "right"
If this law was not bend or shifted to accept "affairs" (according to our discussion), Islam would be degraded and it's followers gone.. if I can't do it "right" I might as well leave that religion..
Now let's come back to today, a man can have 4 wives,, What !!! you slimeball, how dare you !! U want to die ah ! hahahaha
Suddenly the "right" doesn't seem so right anymore..but it's the law. That's how we see it today
Now we come back to our topic and understands about laws, and please have an open mind on this...
To have an affair with the one you love - is an acceptable wrong, it's merely that the law forbids because we can't change it for you few for the sake of the majority. Now do you see my point ? hehehehe...:)
I know its off topic, but that's the least I could do for the people of Beichun, China :(
goto link below:
http://fishhunting.blogspot.com/2008/05/i-dont-know-but-i-do-know.html
and a million thanks :)
Fish Hunter: It is so interesting the way you put statistic approach that leads to decision making to commit affair...Haha =)
The truth is we dont have to be the minority (which stands on the right lane) to opposse affair. Some people know that affair is NOT RIGHT but yet they commit it! Was it influence by the statistic? I dont think so. To me; Its a MATTER of CHOICE lor!
If the person is GATAL, surely he will think for a reason to GATAL la....Mana ada statistic involve lor....Mwhahahaha! =P
BTW, wah you involve in fish bzness.....If I need a whale for my wedding, I look for you ya! Special discount OK! Haha =)
pam :) love you.
BTW, wah you involve in fish bzness.....If I need a whale for my wedding, I look for you ya! Special discount OK! Haha =)
Sorry Adrian, I am a law abiding citizen, Whaling is illegal, if I sell them to you, I will be jailed. hahahaha
mmmm let me see if I can unlawfully but rightfully get them for you .. hahahaha
I can smuggle them out of Japan and sell you as Tuna meat hahahaha
Illegal but then you can sell and eat them, Isn't the law abit funny?
There.. another example of "acceptable wrong" in play
Again, like I said.. the law can shift up and down so long as the majority finds it acceptable.
Japanese and Eskimos have been eating whales for centuries, you can't just make a law and stop something that has been the livelihood from their ancestors so now what to do?
Eskimos are allowed because that is their food and source of energy
Japanese are allowed to whale because they are the scientist who studies whales and probably learn from the killings of the whales so as to study them further so that they won't go extinct.
The rest of the world.. hands off ... (*sorry, I may be wrong, I don't know who else are allowed)
I smell a rotten fish here... hehehe
I see an "affair" in the lurch, but it's ok.. it's acceptable "wrong-doing" being made "right" so that the law of majority still stands :)
See the resemblence accept this time, its fish.. so women don't mind because they love fishes too :) hahahahaha...
ooh.. not married..mmm that means you haven't taste "salted fish and porridge" yet hahaha
*ok..ok.. treat this as a joke.. hehehe
hahahaha... Hi Pammy, its been a while... was bored.. hence dropped by your blog for some entertainment.. u never still never seized to amaze me with your blogs.. hehe.. cheers
Hi Adrian & Zecount
Maybe you should read this and compare your relationship sins
when your worst sin is an inch compared to this 1 KM of horror
When a man rapes a girl, a girl is the sinner and punished to death.
Click my ID to know more.. :)
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