"It's not that I want to... I have to."
I said that. In a conversation with a friend whom I haven't seen in ages (because I'm always working, I have no life, and I'd very much rather sleep whenever I find free time on my hands). It's true, though. I don't work as hard as I do because I want to. (The anal perfectionist in me continues living life in denial. Just let her be.) It's only because I feel that I should, and that I have to.
Firstly, I don't think there's a need for me to explain why I should work for what I earn. If you even bother asking, I'll know how hard YOU work. Hah. But really now. Nothing comes free. (Oh, don't we all know that.) And anything that does, eventually comes with a price. Ironic, innit? So, yeah. That's all I have to say about this. I shan't elaborate further. Good to have clarified why I should work.
Moving on.
Why I have to work.
Now, this is something I don't expect many of you, males, to understand. Believe me when I say this: I'm not being sexist or feminist. I'm not! But PEOPLE ARE. All I'm doing is responding to the situation. Reacting the way I am – by working hard – because of other factors that have somehow affected my worldview and ultimately, my approach to work.
My theory is this: men do not have to work as hard as women because comparatively, they have less to prove... or disprove. (It really depends on how you look at it.) In spite of women empowerment at the workplace and whatnot, there is still a need for us to strive harder in a coed working environment to disprove all negative theories held against us that are illegitimate and untrue.
We know that life's unfair and we're well aware of the cards that are stacked against us. Most of what matters is not in our favour and if you'd just open your eyes to the discrimination that still stands in many societies and workplace arenas today, you'd see it. This knowledge of our disadvantage is what keeps the hard-headed, determined, never-say-die ones among us competitive. It's what keeps us fighting for our place in the workplace and our fair share of the income pie.
My theory is this: men do not have to work as hard as women because comparatively, they have less to prove... or disprove. (It really depends on how you look at it.) In spite of women empowerment at the workplace and whatnot, there is still a need for us to strive harder in a coed working environment to disprove all negative theories held against us that are illegitimate and untrue.
We know that life's unfair and we're well aware of the cards that are stacked against us. Most of what matters is not in our favour and if you'd just open your eyes to the discrimination that still stands in many societies and workplace arenas today, you'd see it. This knowledge of our disadvantage is what keeps the hard-headed, determined, never-say-die ones among us competitive. It's what keeps us fighting for our place in the workplace and our fair share of the income pie.
25 comments :
I don’t mind if women strive harder to disapprove the -ve perceptions against them. However that does not mean that we (men) should not work as hard as the women. The concept is this; he that does not work, shall not eat.
Ultimately men do toil hard to earn and to be the bread winner for the family. For example, I don’t think that the action of doing so is to prove to the WOMEN that we are superior than them, BUT we are there to carry out our responsibilities.
When come to the question of who is getting the biggest portion of the pie in the society. It’s not about the GENDER that matters but the question of WILL and CAPABILITY!
Cheers, Adrian ;)
No, of course you guys have no reason to work any less hard as compared to us. I'm just saying it takes more for a woman to come to a point when she can be respected for what she does and what she's capable of doing.
And that's not saying that men aren't worthy to be looked up to. It's just that somehow, it seems a more "natural" thing to look up to a man than it is for a man to look up to a woman as his supervisor. Especially not if she's young.
So, yeah. It's not a matter of gender in telling who's great and who's not. To that I agree. But unfortunately, not many think like we do. =(
Cheers.
Typically there are not many female engineers compared to the males at my workplace. Many associated engineeering is the place for men however I start to see that women do play their parts too. Do not ever despise women as some of them are really that SMART and guess what; they are able to carry equipment (which is at least 20KG) on their own! They have the look and brain too.
The truth is this; the era is no longer tied to physical strength and domination but it is now spearheaded with KNOWLEDGE based industry. There is where women start to chirp in an play their parts. =)
I agree with Adrian 100% on this one. I don't know why most gals have this INFERIORITY COMPLEX that keeps telling them we men are looking down on ladies..
SINCE when? And what issit that we actually do that gives you girls that impression?
The only complains which I have for women is that generally they talk too darn much and that their driving skills sucks. I have never blogged nor commented anything chauvinistic about ladies and proffesional areas of work.
I think most men share my sentiments: we respect ladies just as much as we respect other fellow guys.
ATTN: adrian
– Well, no, I wasn't referring to physical strength in terms of abilities but in terms of management skills and mental capabilities. I dunno. Even I believe that working with men is a lot easier than working with women. Perhaps it's because they're less emotional creatures or something. I dunno what it is. It's just easier working with men. Plus, men bosses tend to be nicer than women bosses. It's sad that I'm saying this but it's what I've observed. Note, however, that I AM generalising.
ATTN: Leon
– I wouldn't call it an inferiority complex. And anyway, I didn't say that men looked down on us. It's oftentimes the women who find it difficult to look up to another women. Somehow or another, while men think that women who've "made it" are superpowers in their own rights, it's the WOMEN subordinates who wonder (and gossip about) who they kissed or who they slept with to get where they are. It's pathetic, really.
Don't terasa lah. Haiyo. Always liddat. Jumping to conclusions based on what I say. I didn't say that men don't respect us. I just said that men are somewhat easier to respect than women. Feeling inferior somewhat, Leon?
Pam: I met those women with excellent management skills and mental capabilities before. I like to speak to these women! They are simply amazing and attractive in some ways. I don't really know how they get there but I don't doubt their capabilities either. No joke, they are that GOOD! And I don't think that women should ever 'trade' their bodies to climb the organization ladders. And sad enough I must say this; if these WOMEN do not know how to respect their bodies, then do expect the men to respect you at all! Haha
Ladies(Boss) in your office that bad meh?! Im surprised! I thought women should understand women better? Haih...
Anyway, don't be alarmed and discouraged if you met these difficult peoples irrespective of genders. Treat it as a learning curve. You will feel better in that way. Take this as an opportunity to sharpen your skills in handling different peoples. You will certainly benefits from it in the long run. They actually help you to sharpen your characters unknowingly. So the very next time you meet with this peoples, you can laugh and say this "Easy job man! I know how to handle them.".
Leon: Give me five man! Cant blame them as some men do really despise women. That is why we should work harder to clarify all these misconceptions. Not all men are like that. And true, we RESPECT women as they are! Cheers. =)
Sorry I dunno what happened to my keyboard just now.....anyway that anonymous was me....=)
some correction, I dunno why the NOT is not there..:-
"And sad enough I must say this; if these WOMEN do not know how to respect their bodies, then do NOT expect the men to respect you at all!"
Haha. Yeah. I realised that. Funny lah you.
Anyway, yep. I have met some fantastic women. One of whom was a lecturer of mine. She's simply amazing. Brilliant and wise... and I don't think she had to trade her body to get her where she's at. Her brain puts many men's brains to shame. Really. She's probably got an IQ of 168.
But yeah. I agree. Selling yourself and your soul for a quick step up the ladder isn't worth it. What for? It just shows that you're not smart anyways and you need to resort to back alley methods to get to where you wanna be.
Nah, we dun have lady boss here. But I did my internship in this company where there was only ONE guy. Everybody else female. That was hell, man. Really. Women are terribly difficult creatures to work with. (Even if I do say so myself.) I blame their insecurity. Cos if they were secure and had healthy self-esteem, they wouldn't behave the way they do.
Uh?! Wat funny.....Im seriousla =P
Whoa! IQ of 168 lor...I sket! But this woman if I find her, I sure "kau" wan...very rare breed. I like! Let see if this type of woman can solve my riddles..
Hahaha...I pity the only Guy in your previous company. I believe he sure kena bully kau-kau wan...
Seriously, difficult women I met a lot lar. U know the ones that we called aunties(already so long expired) and yet not married...the moment they buka saja mulut,whoa.. your ears can turn deaf one. HAHAHA =)))
You wanna kau her?! Please. Uncle, she's so much older than you are. Plus, she's probably no longer on the hunt. Haha.
The only guy in my previous company left. Haha. He's with Hitz.FM now as one of the DJs. Good for him lah. I think he was sick and tired of all the women di. =p
WAAA. I know that type! The 40-year-old spinsters! They make life hell, man. Especially if they're 40 years of age, not married AND teachers. Die.
Oik! Oik! Not her lah... I meant young woman like her la.....My eyes belum kena tampal stamp lagi la, still can see clearly....=P Hahaha..
The ones I met not teachers but Expired yet available SECRETARIES....and sometimes they do 'hiao-hiao' with us. Yuck! Yuck! I lari first....These women, kepala ada angin wan...
Eeyer! You're so terrible! I was referring to maturity and all that but for you... it's all about the physical! Tsk tsk.
Haha. Secretaries ah. Ok wat. Everyday make coffee for you you dun wan meh? HAHA.
Hahaha...Maturity, I want! Physical; I also want......Who wants to hug ugly wife wor?
If young and smart secretaries, OK la but that ones.....Old, garang & Hiao ; beh tahan.....I rather make coffee on my own. =P
Waaa. You everything also want, you everything got bo?
Nope...I dont expect everything but the essential characteristics must be there before I can call her, 'partner'. 2 types of women I really cannot stand:-
1. Low EQ
2. Hiao.
Some women think that if they are hiao, they are superb...Pffttt...
The fact is women do not have to be hiao-ed to look elegant and attractive. Sounds like OT? already... Hahaha =P
ATTN: adrian
– You didn't answer my question. =p
And no, I dun think that hiao women are all that. In fact, I see them as the total opposite. They gross me out. I have very little patience with such lightheaded beings. Yeah, man. I should write an OTB one day. Just to be fair.
Hahaha....The answer is I do not have everything and I dont expect everything also la BUT if I have her, Hmmm.....My Treasure!. =P
Ehwah! OTB is in writing....Spill it woman! I cant wait for it. Too many freaks out there. Train them kau-kau so we(men) have more good breeds of women (OTB graduates) to select.....Mwahahaha =))))
Haha. Wait lah. Have to process my thoughts first ma. Work things out in my head. You wait and see lah. Haha. I think it'd be an interesting post to write, too. Hopefully I dun get bashed too much for writing it. =p
Hahaha....Never mind; you write, I will block all the 'bashing' for you huh! Lets see what those women have to say....=P Hahaha...
Haha. You can block meh!? How you wanna block? Later they boycott my blog then how?
Hahaha...put a disclaimer there lor: -
" Written on behalf of Adrian.....If you gals need to bash up sombody...hunt him in Pg huh!" =P
Hopefully no woman with karate black belt will hunt me down....I sket....I sket.....=)
Backside I write on your behalf. I write for ME, okay!
Hahaha.....*laughing hard while releasing pigs to kiss the backside"...Mwahahaha =P
Haha. Pigs? Yuck. That's real gross. Especially if they're flying out from your backside.
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