Monday, November 26, 2007

Your Tummy Just Became Public Property

Yep, that's what happens when ovum meets sperm in a woman.

I'll be the first to say it: pregnancy is a beautiful thing. It is, it is. But it's also a pretty weird time for a woman, too. She gets emo for absolutely no reason at all. She feels the urge to pee every half hour or so. She craves the oddest things. (And please note that any man who denies his pregnant wife anything she so desires is a jerk through and through. No arguments accepted.) She wades around like a whale upright but the world tells her she's looking stunning. And she pukes in the morning, in the afternoon, in the night, or in the morning, noon and night.

And come on lah. When does a woman with the stomach of a whale EVER look good?! Do you think she even believes you when you say that? And don't forget... you're talking to an emotional roller coaster that's running on estrogen when you do, so I'm thinking she's probably believing otherwise before you even open your mouth to speak. Unless, of course, she's anything like me when I'm I eventually get pregnant lah. *grin*

Anyhew, that's not what this post is about. What I meant to write about is the fact that pregnancy is the only time a woman's stomach goes on free-for-all mode. Somehow or another, for the duration of 9 months, her bloated stomach is, automatically and by default, stripped of its Private Property status and is thrown head-first (if it had any) into the Public Property section.

It is and will probably be the only time in her life when men and women, young and old are given full access and are granted default permission to touch, pat and prod WITHOUT her or her husband's prior approval, with or WITHOUT the coverage of fabric of any sort. Any form of objection on her or her husband's part is deemed highly inappropriate and terribly unnecessary. Why? Cos she's pregnant mah!

Sigh. How come nobody want to touch my stomach wan? =(


Anonymous said...

you have a stomach to begin with? :P

pamsong said...

Hmmm. An anonymous comment. Should I respond? I shouldn't. But I really wanna say something. Okay, I will. But just cos it's fun biting back. Heh heh.

*clears throat*

Of course got lah! You dun have? Where does your food go after it goes past your esophagus? It's all about biology, my friend. Size doesn't matter. =p

chunleung said...

my tummy is about 3 months. how come no one touches mine then?

pamsong said...

*blink blink*

Somehow... That just sounds wrong coming from a guy. HAHA.

adrian said...

Wei! Wei! You wanna us to die in your husband's fist har...Hahaha =P

pamsong said...

Haha. Like, no. But then again, it does happen loh. I see it all the time. As long as a woman is pregnant (especially once she reaches 6 months and the baby starts kicking actively), her stomach becomes a free-for-all already.

Kirsten said...

who said a woman with the stomach of a whale EVER look good...

i think my aunt is at her peak (for both pregnancies) when she is a couple of months more till due... her skin practically GLOWS

*psst.. dun tell my aunt ah

pamsong said...

Haha. Yeah, I know. I love the look of pregnant women, too. I think that they look amazing. Love it lah. LOVE IT.

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