Dreaming With A Broken Heart

Artist: John Mayer Song
Title: Dreaming With A Broken Heart

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part
You roll out of bed and down on your knees
And for a moment you can hardly breathe

Wondering was she really here
Is she standing in my room?
No, she's not
'Cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The giving up is the hardest part
She takes you in with her crying eyes
Then all at once you have to say goodbye

Wondering, could you stay, my love?
Will you wake up by my side?
No, she can't
'Cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone

Now do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my, roses in my hands?
Would you get them if I did?
No, you won't
'Cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part

It's been 3 days and 16 hours since you left us. 88 hours since we hugged and shared a teary goodbye at KLIA 2. And yet, I continue to find myself feeling heavy-hearted and blue because of the lack of you.


I instinctively want to tell you stories of all the funny and silly things JJ does so we can laugh about it together. But you're not around to listen to me to. I come home expecting to hear funny stories, too. But of course, I hear none. And up till now, JJ and I still find ourselves accidentally calling out your name when we need help.


Three nights ago, you got in touch and the kids shared hellos, goodnights and I-miss-yous with you over WhatsApp. Two evenings ago, JJ asked to send you video a video telling you about the flowers he picks from school. Just yesterday, JZ said, "I miss her a lot, Mommy. I want Aunty Jas to come back."


Sigh. It's really isn't easy moving on after two years of togetherness. Especially not when space and time (i.e. every waking moment) are shared. But all good things must come to an end. And I guess what they say is true – this really feels like a break-up. Mutual, but no less painful and heartbreaking.

Goodbye, Dear Jas.

Take care over there in Davao.

And may we meet again

someday, somewhere, somehow.

XOXO, 

Pam Song