Immunotherapy Round 18 – THE GRAND FINALE!

12.56pm – Cocktail lai liao. I'm really looking forward

to my 10mg of Piriton up my line today. #stim 😆 

1.05pm – Fitri's putting in my line – hurray!

He, Taki and Chong are the bestest best! #nomisses

Kautim!

Snagged myself a bed again today. WIN! Bed over armchair any day.

Brought along my mini hot water bottle, too, so I can stay warm.

Ahhh, comfy. Let's get this over quick!

I'm so not going to miss this view!

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I know I've been super slack when it comes to updating Tinki Talks my treatment progress but this is one milestone that cannot be missed no matter how lazy I get. Cos one super-duper, impossibly looooong year and three weeks later, I've finally completed e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g the doctor ordered.

Gosh, I almost can't believe that I'm done! That's right.

DONE!

Hurrah! 🎉🎉🎉

1 ❌ Lumpectomy – CHECK!

6 ❌ Taxotere Carboplatin Chemotherapy – CHECK!

15 + 5 ❌ Radiotherapy – CHECK!

...and of course...

18 ❌ Herceptin Immunotherapy – CHECK!

Of course, this isn't totally the end, in the sense that I still have a good +/- 5-10 years of Tamoxifen pills left to pop, plus a lifetime of check-ups laid out before me but... Hey! One little victory at a time, right? #ImASurvivor

Lau Gin Na: When Mommies Die... Or Don't They?

It was bedtime and we've had a long day. I was just preparing the kids that I wouldn't be at home tomorrow morning because I had my annual ultrasound and mammogram due – yes, it's been a year 🌈 – when JJ turned to me with earnest eyes and asked...

JJ: Mommy? What happens when you die?

Pam Song: Hmm? What do you mean?

JJ: What happens to us when you die?

🥺 My heart broke when I heard the worry

behind his seemingly innocent question. 💔

Sigh. I feel so sorry that my kids are plagued with such heavy thoughts for children so young. I know I should have gone into how it would be okay and that there are people who will still love and care for him and yada-yada-yada. And that someday, we will meet again after death and be together once more in heaven and bla-bla-bla. But... it wasn't that kind of night. And I felt that he just wanted reassurance that I would be okay. So instead, I said... 

Pam Song: *comfortingly* I will never die.

JJ: 😲 What???

Pam Song: (Nonsense lai liao. 😅😂) Ya. Mommies never die.

JJ: Huh!? Why?! 

Pam Song: Cos when mommies die no one takes care of the kids. So God takes special care of mommies. 

JJ: Ohhhh... That makes sense!

Pam Song: 😂😂😂

And then he snuggled up to me and promptly fell asleep.

Life is short. And every moment is precious. But sometimes we fail to see the truth in those words until we're hit by the tough realities of life – like sickness, suffering and sadness. And as much as I am forever changed by Cancer, I need to remember, so are my kids. They just don't know it yet. 😔 #cancersucks

Dr Teh Vs Bak Kut Teh

In thinking about how to approach the topic of surviving Breast Cancer as a ministry, The Husband and I got into a conversation that led to this bit... 


The Husband: Do interview with Doctor Teh la. (My super awesome Breast Surgeon at Gleneagles.)

JJ: BAK KUT TEH??? Who said Bak Kut Teh???

Pam Song: 😅😂🤣

That's what happens when kids eavesdrop on conversations they're not meant to be a part of. Coupled with the fact that it's dinner time and we haven't yet eaten. 🤣🤣🤣 Having said that, I miss my Klang Bak Kut Teh!!! 😭😭😭 

Lasagne Vs Lazada

As the kids grow up, sometimes it gets confusing talking to them. 😐 Mainly because you assume that topics of conversation will revolve around kiddie contexts. You expect them to talk about things they're familiar with. Things they know about. Like toys and food and hobbies. 

Not adolescent, grown-up things

like tech and online shopping. 

JJ: Mommy, so funny just now Papa asked Kor Kor what he wants for dinner and he said “Beyblade”. 🤣🤣🤣

Pam Song: *confused* Huh? Why? 

 JZ: He wanted to order from his phone. 

 Pam Song: *still confused* Order lasagne from his phone? Why? But we’re not ordering dinner. I'm cooking.

 JZ: No no, he was looking at things to buy. From that shop! The one you buy things. 

 Pam Song: *even more confused* GrabFood? 

JZ: *getting frustrated* Nooo!! The other one! The one you always buy things! The one like that Shopee app!!

Pam Song: OH! Haiyo! It's called LA-ZA-DA! 🤦‍♀️