The Parental Guide to Answering Unanswerable Questions

And so, after a busy and tiring day, it was bedtime again in the Kan household. It was late and I was JUST. SO. READY. for the kids to quieten down and knock out (so I can sneak a wee bit of Me Time before I crash 😝). But right after turning off the lights, Ethan goes, "Mommy..."

🙄

Aiyoooo... This boy really has a knack of talking when he shouldn't. In fact, he talks the most during meal times and bedtimes. Tsk. Anyway, without waiting for me to respond, he cepat-cepat asked his question...

"If a person is fat, does that mean

they have more blood?" 🩸

😳

*blink blink*

Hmmm... Truth be told, I have no idea. LOL. Logically I suppose that makes sense? But I don't know for sure and I just couldn't be bothered to Google at the time because... well, late already la kan. So, I snuck him this reply instead:

"Ooo... Good question!

I can't wait for you to find out and tell me!"

😅😂

Satisfied that he had thought of a good question, he went to bed. Haha! Works every time. 😎 So, if your kid ever asks you questions you don't know the answers to, you know what to do. Happy parenting!

Quit Playin' Games With My Heart

The boys have been begging us for a pet for a long while now. And not like a guppy or a terrapin that you contain in a glass box and feed once a day. No, no. They want a cat. 😺 Or a dog. 🐶 Like, wth? I blame all those playdates at friends' houses. One of JZ's friends has 7 pets of various kinds. Another has a new British Shorthair kitten. Craziest story is this: One of JJ's buddies has *drumroll please* 28 cats in his condo. 😵😵‍💫 #siaoliao


While The Husband (who's never really had a pet) is leaning towards ok-ing idea, I, on the other hand am not. Pets are A LOT of work! Living with two sporty pre-teens without a live-in helper is enough work as it is. I am not at all motivated to add more things to my to-do, to-wash and to-clean list, thank you. These people don't clear, wash and clean so they don't understand the amount of work that already comes with running a household of 2 adults and 2 kids. 😤 

Now, you wanna make it

4 adults and 2 kids PLUS 1 pet??

Aiya, mai laaaaa...

Don't trouble Trouble if Trouble 

hasn't trouble you la, come on! 😩

We visited CTY in Penang once with the intention of getting a pup for the boys. But after seeing the dogs step all over their poop, The Husband quickly made a mental U-turn and changed his mind. But today, while heading towards DPULZE Shopping Mall, Cyberjaya (that also has a big pet store), this conversation ensued:

The Husband: Ok la, boys! Let’s go get a dog! 

 JZ & JJ: Yayyyy!!! 

 The Husband: We buy from DPULZE! 

 JZ & JJ: Yayyyy!!!

 The Husband: Just kidding. 

 JZ & JJ: Booooo… 

JZ: Papa, if you want to say anything, and it’s a lie, don’t say it. Because you make us excited. Then you break our hearts. 

 JJ: Words of wisdom, Kor Kor. 

 The Husband: Haha. Okay. Sorry. 

 JJ: Yes. Then you make us want to cry and die.

😅😅😅

Needless to say, we left DPULZE without a pet.

You know, it's too bad my boys 

aren't familiar with the Backstreet Boys.

Otherwise, they'd be singing this tune right about now:

"Quit playin' games with my heart 

Before you tear us apart (my heart) 

Quit playin' games with my heart 

I should've known from the start 

You know you got to stop (from my heart) 

You're tearing us apart (my heart) 

Quit playin' games with my heart:

– Quit Playing Games (With My Heart)

by Backstreet Boys

Me, I'm definitely more of a dog person than a cat person.

And I do secretly love the idea of having a puppy at home. 🤫

But I've been there and done that with Princess. 🥲 I now understand that although having a pet has its fun and emotional upsides, the cleaning up after each poo and pee... the weekly baths... the nail-cutting and toothbrushing... the daily feeding and water filling... the inconvenience when going on holidays... and not to mention the heartbreak and emotional trauma that follows in the days after their deaths because, well, we'll definitely outlive our pets at this point... it's just not worth it. 

I would be perfectly happy to go through life

without having to go through all this again.

That's not to say my kids should never get pets. They can get their own pets when they have their own homes. Then I'll go over for some doggy playtime. 😎

Thoughts About Rudeness

In the Disney 1942 animated feature film Bambi, Thumper the bunny wisely said, “If you can’t say somethin' nice, don’t say nothin' at all.” 

That means: don’t be rude. 🙊🤐

He forgot to add, “If you ain't gettin' at decent reply, don’t bother askin' at all.” 

This means: don’t accept rudeness either. 🙉😤

Food Rationing

It's not easy managing the kids when they're so competitive all the time. Maybe it's a boy thing. Or maybe it's just a sibling thing I wouldn't know about. 😅 #singlechild


Somehow, there's always that tendency for one-upmanship – no matter what! Smarter! Better! Quicker! More! Thing is, when it comes to food, both always fight for LESS. Why? Because with less food on their plates, they can finish faster. 🙄 (Still with the one-upmanship, duncha think? #neverendingstory)

Pam Song: JJ, hurry up and finish your food.

JJ: But you gave me MORE than Kor Kor!

Pam Song: Nonsense! I gave you the SAME. 😠

JZ: Ya laaaa... (Adding fuel to fire. 🔥) Mummy gave ME more at the start ok! *smug face*

Pam Song: Wait. What?? NONSENSE!! I am FAIR!!! 😡

Does this stop when they're older?

Or will it always be like this? 😅

Whatever the case, it's true though.

Mommy's always fair. 😁

Reminder To Self That It Won't Always Be Like This

Came across this beautiful piece of motherly musings on Instagram today and it really resonated with me. Especially now that the kids are growing up and my babies are no longer babies. 

No longer do they gurgle and leave their spit all over my top. No longer do they waddle, slip and fall on their bums. No more do they mumble gibberish I don't understand but smile and respond to anyway. 

They're 7 and 9; going on 8 and 10. How quickly they grow up. How swiftly time flies. I know it's still a long way aways till the day they no longer need me more than I need them. But the day is fast approaching and I feel it in my heart already anyway. 😢

------------

It won’t always be like this. 

I remind myself of this often. 

To help me see through the hard days, but to also pull me into the now. 

Because it’s true. 

They won’t always be this small. 

And I won’t always be this tired. 

They won’t always need me in this way. 

And I won’t always feel this lost. 

They won’t always come to me first. 

And I won’t also feel like I come last. 

This is a season. 

We will move through it together. 

And it will pass before we know it. 

It won’t always be like this. 

And my heart aches as I think about what it may look like. 

The first school drop off. 

The last kiss goodnight. 

The nights up late waiting for a call that doesn’t come. 

Because life will be different one day. 

And it won’t always be this tiring, messy, or beautifully wholesome. 

It will be watching from afar from a clean house, longing for them to come home for a weekend. 

It will be loving them through phone lines, messenger, and the kilometres between us. 

It will be losing myself in something new, to busy my mind from what I’m missing. 

It won’t always be like this. 

Not the hard. 

Or the beautiful.

It will be a different hard and beautiful. 

We won’t always be like this either.

We will age. 

And our relationship will evolve. 

We will be a different type of “us”. 

But this is my one chance at now. 

I only get to love them, be there for them, and be needed in this exact way, once. 

I only get to know this stage of motherhood like the back of my hand, once. 

I only get this time as we are now, once. 

This is it. 

I only get one Motherhood. 

And they only get one childhood. 

This time is ours. 

So I’m breathing it in, in all of its shades, 

Because it just won’t always be like this. 

📖 Words (@wordsof_emmaheaphy), taken from the second book “Mother On” in her early motherhood collection.