So I'm now at Season 3 of Grey's Anatomy – Season 3, Episode 20: Time After Time, to be exact. (Yes, I'm still going strong.)
In this particular episode, the characters are seen to go through emotional turmoil that result from a string of unfortunate events that began taking place in earlier episodes. The Chief tries his luck with the ladies and fails, McSteamy deals with his 2-month deal of sexless-ness, McDreamy lost his promised place as Chief, Grey tries dealing with having a fake mom pop by more often than she'd like...
Izzy's 11-year-old daughter has leukemia, O'Malley tries forgetting that he's slept with Izzy, Torres is unaware that O'Malley has cheated on her, Karev becomes too emotionally involved with a Jane Doe patient, Yang's ex-boyfriend comes to Seattle Grey to woo her back, and Burke deals with the next Chief-in-Line being Yang's very-smart, super-surgeon ex-boyfriend.
In this particular episode, the characters are seen to go through emotional turmoil that result from a string of unfortunate events that began taking place in earlier episodes. The Chief tries his luck with the ladies and fails, McSteamy deals with his 2-month deal of sexless-ness, McDreamy lost his promised place as Chief, Grey tries dealing with having a fake mom pop by more often than she'd like...
*takes deep breath*
Izzy's 11-year-old daughter has leukemia, O'Malley tries forgetting that he's slept with Izzy, Torres is unaware that O'Malley has cheated on her, Karev becomes too emotionally involved with a Jane Doe patient, Yang's ex-boyfriend comes to Seattle Grey to woo her back, and Burke deals with the next Chief-in-Line being Yang's very-smart, super-surgeon ex-boyfriend.
Pretty much everybody on the show
is feeling the sting of things lah.
is feeling the sting of things lah.
There's this part nearing the end of the episode that I thought I'd share. It's when McDreamy a.k.a Dr. Derek Shepherd (played by the very-suave, very-puppy-dog-eyed Patrick Dempsey) walks into the 8-million-dollar Denny Duquette Memorial Clinic to speak to the typically kick-ass, fire-mouthed Dr. Miranda Bailey (played by Chandra Wilson). Considering Bailey's the only one who's not drowned by drama in this episode, it makes perfect sense that he goes to her for emotional counseling, instead of anybody else (i.e. the only other person with no emotional trauma to deal with in this episode, his ex-wife – Montgomery. The following conversation ensues:
McDreamy: You warned me she would become a problem.
Bailey: Who? Meredith?
McDreamy: When you love somebody, you think you can handle it all.
Bailey: You've done alright. Both of you.
McDreamy: I came out here to be Chief... and Meredith complicates that.
Bailey: Heh. Well, if this turns into an either-or, you pick the person you love. End of story. Look, all of this means nothing... if you're alone.
I couldn't agree more. I have the
utmost respect for this scriptwriter.
I'll bet it's a girl.
*grin*
Gotta be a girl.
utmost respect for this scriptwriter.
I'll bet it's a girl.
*grin*
Gotta be a girl.
On a more serious note, I think whoever wrote that part of the script got it right. Your career? Or a happily-ever-after? When one comes in the way of the other, how do you choose?
Well, if you've gotta chose between having the one you love or having a position you want at the workplace, choose the former. Always choose the former. I would. Everything else does mean nothing if, after achieving everything you want do achieve and doing everything you want to do, all you're going home to is an empty house and a bag of cold, soggy, take-away dinner.
Well, if you've gotta chose between having the one you love or having a position you want at the workplace, choose the former. Always choose the former. I would. Everything else does mean nothing if, after achieving everything you want do achieve and doing everything you want to do, all you're going home to is an empty house and a bag of cold, soggy, take-away dinner.
17 comments :
Wha...this is a difficult one.
Career or love.
Choices choices choices. I also dun know
ATTN: 3POINT8
– Yeah, I hate making important choices, too. I mean, if you let me choose hokkien mee or wan ton mee, can lah. But this?! Forget it. My brain turns to jelly – totally useless.
Eventually you need both to keep moving....and priority changes over time. But neither W nor L should be neglected at all times cos they just support one & another.....Rock On! =)
ATTN: adrian
– Yeah, rock on. But it's kinda hard to keep rocking if you can't even decide on what you want... or need.
You see, the way I see it, one is a want, the other is a need. Do you want the one you love? Or do you need the one you love? Do you want the job you want? Or do you need the job you want?
Think about it. I think I kinda make sense there.
Need = things that you cant live without it.
Want = things that probably that you could live without. demand?
Yeah....sometimes humans are sandwiched in between these scenarios and decision need to be made.
If you talk about JOB, I need it and if Love, I want it.....its all ties down to how bad your desire is. But that doesnt mean that it stays there forever....
When Job becomes Want and Love becomes Need, then there is where marriage kicks in.....But did I abbandoned it? The answer is NO. Most likely its about Timing & Prioritization....=)
ATTN: adrian
– Need: Correct definition in my eyes.
Want: Hmmm. More like, things you can live without but you don't WANT to live without. Less of a demand. More of a desire.
Do you think you feel the way you do about work being need and love being want because of your priority at this point of time in your life? Because if it's not, then GREAT! Haha. Yay for you! AND your future wife! Haha.
BUT NOOOOO! How can you say that when love becomes need and job becomes want then you get married!? NO NO NO! It should be when want meets need in Love, then only you get married!
Haha..correctlah...Correct...its the priority at the moment that matters and she gotta wait.
Many look up to men as the bread winners for the family...and I can say most of us will prioritize our CAREER first....So its a norm.....As for woman, you just gotta understand your man...cos we knew that no woman will ever marry a man that is unable to provide financially and emotionally...=)
but we are still young. HOw to chooooseeee??
ATTN: adrian
– Sigh. Quite sad right if liddat? But... if your work is fulfilling, I can understand why you don't see the need for a gf. You'd probably have to ignore her some of the time anyways considering you're working and studying at the same time.
Hmmm. I know that it's the man's 'duty' to be the breadwinner lah. But it's also his duty to care for his girl mah. To spend time with her. To invest his time into her as well. The returns are higher... in the long run. What's a life of money and fame when you have nobody to share it with?
And who says a woman will NEVER marry a man who cannot provide financially? Not true. I'd rather marry a hardworking man who is struggling to make ends meet but LOVES ME TO DEATH... than one who's off fighting for his place at the workplace and doesn't give me the time of day.
ATTN: ming
– Love. Got with love. =p
Aiseh...talk like an expert huh! Not bad...not bad...Hahaha.....=P
Yeah! Work is pretty satisfying and studies excite....and of course gf is a need, but better make sure that she is understanding otherwise SUSAH....more tension than joy.
Realistically, it cannot be convincing enough if I tell my girl that I love her but in the end of the day could not supply her basic needs materially. I think she will question me on this cos its the man's responsibility.....Yeah! Money is not everything but without money you barely could support the woman that you love and the man will certainly feel bad about it.
Having said that, it doesnt mean that we shall neglect the emotional investment part, cos all of us need that to keep moving on regardless of gender.
If you ask me which one I prefer...I will choose BOTH and blend them into ONE....Hahaha =P
ATTN: adrian
– Haha. Thank you, thank you. I try. =p
It's true what you say. People who find joy in their work and their own activities need partners who are exceptionally understanding. You're right lah. Or else more tension than joy. You come home, wanna share the excitement of what you've accomplished, you kena scolded for putting in so much effort at the workplace pula. A bit hard lor. Cos in everything, people want partners who are supportive of what they do mah. And if a person cannot understand the demands of your job, they're not being supportive.
Hmmm. Okay, I agree that if you SAY you will love her and take care of her but cannot provide, you're not being fair to her lah. BUT... women also know that this is a dog eat dog world mah. Basic needs ma cukup di loh. Food, shelter, medication, blah blah blah... No need like big diamonds and luxurious cruise lor. I'm sure the girl will understand. If she doesn't, she's not a very reasonable person. Very materialistic. But I understand when you say it makes you feel bad when you cannot provide for her in every way you want to provide for her. Many of the guys I speak to tell me that, too.
I guess we're all kiasu in this world lah hor? We don't want to have to choose between two good things. We want them BOTH. =p
Hahaha......Correctla! Correct....cannot say the girl is totally materialistic alsolor. Let say if the husband can afford and the wife is longing for a diamond ring for her lifetime, I think that is not too much lor...And which girl doesnt fall in love with diamonds and flowers?
And I can say, its the environment that we are living in that taught us to be materially driven... And I can gurantee you that, no matter how well your man provides, there is always a temptation that you will compare you man with your friend's man....that is the challenge that you will never escape.....and it ties down to how well you handle the situation. =)
But if the husband is just merely make ends meet, then the lady has to understand, park her feets and walk the isle together with her husband la.....
But think of it, how many unmarried girls are willling to accept these men as life partner? I believe the percentage is very little these days......that why men need to work harder to be a better bread winner. So WORK is still the prioritization in the early stage....Rock On! =)
ATTN: adrian
– The girl is being realistic AND materialistic at the same time lah. It depends on how MUCH she cares about what he earns and if it'll determine her love for him.
But yeah... Sometimes, it feels good to reward the person you love with the things you know they'll like. Things you know they dream of having but never ever tell you about it cos they know it'll burden you.
I think men are more willing to spend on diamonds than flowers, though...
And yes... It's cos we're raised to value money and to gauge our success by what we have. It's also a Chinese thing, I believe. To believe that success means having millions in the bank. I beg to differ. Having a lot of money does not make a person successful.
True... We'll always be tempted to look at the grass on the other side of the fence. To look longingly summore. But... grass always greener on the other side lah hor? I'm sure the other fella has his flaws, too. It's just that we don't see it.
I think... it depends on what a girl values. If it's a lifetime of happiness and love, then it doesn't matter if the man she's going to marry is still at a point where he's just making ends meet. She'll understand and the suffering to be with him becomes worth it in so many other ways. There are just some things that money can't buy. Happiness is one of them. But yeah, the percentage of women like this is low. Very low.
ROCK ON!
Haha...men are more willing to spend on flowers vs diamonds la....why? Bcos flowers are CHEAPER lar...Mwahahaha =P
Even if you look at the grass on the other side...say nothing la and guard your heart. Anyway thats normal la...cos u know why? We men do the same thing also....Wkakaka =P
ATTN: adrian
– No lahhhh. I said they're more willing to spend on DIAMONDS than flowers! It's the other way around. I personally think it's cos they feel that flowers will die eventually so no point spending the money. They don't see the intrinsic value in it.
But yeah... You SHOULD guard your heart. But what's giving yourself in to love if you never let your guard down? It doesn't work also lah. And it's not fair to your partner.
Men and women are both jerks.
Hahaha...it depends how you look at it la.....flowers may die but the real intention doesnt mah.......and btw its never a waste cos dried flowers can be used as potpouri mah....
You can accumulate over the years and display it on your wedding day la.....Hahaha =))
Guard here means....watch yout heart so that you do not sin against your partner la....as for married couples, ehem...the Bible say "marriage bed shall not be devoured" .....=)
ATTN: adrian
– Ya lor. I AGREE! The intention behind the flowers never dies. If only more men knew that!!!
Display on my wedding day? No way! It's time for NEW flowers! Wahahahahahhaa.
Oh! Cheh. Guard for me means not let yourself go and surrender your all to your partner. Different understanding. Haha.
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