Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Mastery Of The Art

Class: Sleep 101, Lesson 1
Text: The Art of Sleep; Chapter 1, Page 3.

KNOW THE TECHNICAL TERMS INVOLVED
IN THE STUDY OF THE ART OF SLEEP


Sleep: A condition of body and mind such as that
which typically recurs for several hours every night,
in which the nervous system is relatively inactive,
the eyes closed, the postural muscles relaxed,
and consciousness practically suspended.

Sleepable: Possessing the ability to sleep.

Sleepability: The state of being able to sleep.


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Hello everybody, and welcome to Sleep 101.

If you didn't already know, my name is Tinki
and I will be your professor for the day.


That being said, time is precious so let's not dilly dally any more than we really have to and get down to learning about Sleep, the many forces that come into play when Sleep is manipulated, how you can pro-actively make Sleep work for you and in your life, as well as your hand in dealing with the much-coveted Sleep card.


You see, after years of achieving a high sleepability to non-sleepability ratio, I discovered that Sleep was my innate gift. It was my thing. Little did I know that it would one day become my forte and craft. Watch me make my way to fame, keep your eyes on this page and learn well.


That's all for today's lesson.

Now, as a note on the side...


Boys and girls, if you ever need help sleeping, just give me a call and be prepared to embrace my mastery of the art through the lecture of a lifetime. It's all about utilizing and manipulating System Saiko to the best of your ability and making it work for you. Welcome that, let it wholly consume you, and believe you me, Sleep will soon be at your mercy. Call and it shall come. Banish it to eternal damnation and it shies away forever. The call is yours to make, not Sleep's.


Now, for some self-directed puffery to end this session.


I managed two whole hours of sleep last night. See? I am a highly sleepable individual and I say this with years of sleep experience under my belt. If any of your friends didn't make it for this lecture, do not hesitate to refer them to my website: tinkitalks.blogspot.com, or simply get them to call my toll free line at 1-800-isleep. Alternatively, my book "Anyone Can Sleep" is now on sale at all major bookstores near you. Grab your copy today.

2 comments :

K.Lo said...

i think we've been thru this, tinki.

all the milk, reading books, tiring urself out don't work?

what about a consistent sleep pattern? or does that even exist for tinki?

what you need is peace baby... inner peace... be one with the Cosmos...

pamsong said...

HAHAHAHA.

Be one with the cosmos? Some Scientology freak you're turning out to be. Or is it Astrology-ology? =p

My sleep patterns are pretty much set these days. Not bad di lah. Except for when I get hit with bouts of insomnia. I KO-ed, though. Haha. Slept in 5 mins last night. Not bad huh? I'm so proud of me.

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